Snowmen
by Scottea
Summary: A part is missing but yet it is not apart. The two deal with two others to reveal more than one truth.
1. Chapter 1

Captain James T. Kirk stood looking out at the storm as the snow swirled in the wind and built up against the walls and buildings, covering everything, hiding everything.. He was dimly aware of the conversations going on behind him. All was just noise when he wanted to hear a beloved voice. There was an empty space beside him. And there were the questions, far too many unanswered questions, even more questions with answers that somehow seemed wrong. Questions and possible answers kept squirreling around in his head as they had for days.

His Chief Medical Officer had come over and handed him a drink, "You're going to have to join the higher echelon group soon, Jim. Apart from meeting them when we got here you have been standing over here just looking out there. The search was called off ten standard hours ago. It has been five days. It hurts but we have to,"

Kirk had turned and looked at his friend; saw the pain in the blue eyes that looked back at him, "Don't. Don't say it, Bones. He is out there. Spock is out there and he is alive. He is alive. I know he is alive. I can feel it. I know you and the others do not fully understand what we have but I know he is alive. I would know if he was dead. I would know."

"Jim, all the,"

"I know! I have seen and read and know all about all the evidence, all about all the facts, and how all of the reports and findings point to them being dead but I can't believe it. I won't believe it. I can't explain it but I know he is alive. I don't feel it. I would know, Bones. I would feel it if he was dead. I would feel it and I don't, I don't feel it."

A reassuring hand rested on his shoulder, "You saw the condition that officer was in. You heard what he said."

"I saw him and I heard him but I know what I feel, Bones. I know what I feel."

The hand on his shoulder gently squeezed, "We leave the day after tomorrow. If you refuse to then Commodore Bebram will take command of the Enterprise. He already has an officer lined up to be the First Officer and one to be the Science Officer."

"His own men or,"

"His own men, says they have had starship experience and were able to get here." The hand on his shoulder squeezed slightly, "Don't read more into it than that, Jim. You know we have to have a qualified and experienced crew on the bridge."

For a long time Kirk just looked at his friend. He had told both McCoy and Spock his distrust of Bebram after the man's second day on the ship. The bridge crew had not responded well to him either but they had respected the rank. Bebram had never captained a starship, had not logged many hours on one, but if he did not follow the orders from Starfleet Kirk knew Bebram would be given command of the Enterprise.

Briefly Kirk looked over at the throng of Starfleet's higher echelon and knew he had to go over, exchange a few words and then could beam up to the ship. Just a few words and then he could leave.

"Bones, I,"

"You listen to me, Jim, we might not be him, but we are here for you, we are all here for you."

"Ahh, there you are Kirk. I was just telling our guests how I was sure you would say a few words tomorrow morning in honor of your two crewmembers. My officer thought, and I agreed, it a fitting way to say farewell to them." It had taken Kirk a moment to still the words, to not say what he wanted to say. Bebram was looking at him and Kirk saw that self-assuredness that had been there all along. Right from the start he had thought this man was a danger, this man was after something he had and now he knew without doubt what it was. He knew what it was and just what the man like Bebram was prepared to do to get it. Over the years he had encountered many like him but few as almost openly calculating.

"I will return to the ship and write an appropriate eulogy befitting of their lives and deaths." It came to him as he looked at Bebram. "What time did you have in mind for the service?"

"As we leave at oh six hundred hours the day after," Bebram looked at him as though challenging him to say otherwise, "the service will be at oh nine hundred hours tomorrow. I will begin and you will finish with your fine words. We understand you will then want to spend time with your crew and will need the night to prepare your eulogies so I will see the guests off."

Remembering protocol Kirk nodded to the Starfleet senior officers and said, "If you gentlemen will excuse me."

One of them nodded, "It was a tragic waste of two officers, Kirk. Mister Spock was a most exceptional officer, a leader in his field, and Officer Rallon was more than outstanding in his field. Their loss is not just to you and the Enterprise but to all of us."

"Thank you."

Instead of going to his quarters when he beamed up Kirk went to Spock's. Just for a moment he walked around looking at how orderly it was, how it always was. Echoes of all the times he'd been in here discussing a mission, just talking, or sharing the silence seemed to be surrounding him. He sat on the bed, leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and buried his face in his hands.

"Oh, Spock. I know you are out there. I know you are alive. I can feel you. I cannot get them to believe that you are still alive. The bastards won't let me go out. I'm watched all the time by Bebram. Our orders are for us to leave the day after tomorrow. Dammit! How can I leave without you? There has to be a way. There has to."


	2. Chapter 2

He had first been aware of pain. Remember. He had been in a shuttle returning Officer Carl Rallon to the Enterprise from medical facilities at Starbase Ten. Officer Rallon was sedated and in a medic bed behind them. Them. Jim? No, not Jim. That officer Commodore Bebram had insisted pilot. They had been told of the storm on Fergon Six was getting worse but Commodore Bebram's officer was positive he could land with no problem. There had been a problem. Then nothingness till this cold and pain.

Senior officer. Responsible for safety and welfare of subordinates. First Officer Spock made himself look around. It was too painful to move his head in even more than a forty-five degree rotation. There was no sign of Commodore Bebram's officer. Officer Rallon was still on the medic bed. He himself was on the cold floor, no longer had his thick jacket on, and the side panel of the craft was hanging, banging against the side of the craft allowing the snow in. snow. So cold. Think. The problem as a cause and solution. Rallon should not move. Cold. Not accident. What he heard. Think. Remember. Rallon fell from medic bed. Think of crash. Solution.

A touch on his face. Jim? Eyes looking back at him brown, unknown. Not Jim. Pain, great pain in touch. Not so cold. Can't move.

"I've got you immobilized, Sir. Think you may have neck, back, and jaw injuries. Once I have you bundled up we will start down the hill."

Hill. Flew into hill. Pieces of puzzle coming back. Forget now you are being cared for. Remember the hill.

Had he been able to shake his head Spock would have as the memories solidified and he remembered it all. The way Commodore's officer had ignored his words of warning, the way he had pressed a hypo into his leg saying it was to stop him causing trouble, and how he had flown at an angle into the hill deliberately crashing the craft. Whatever had been in the hypo had had an almost immediate effect as he had found he was unable to move, that he was thrown from his seat by the impact, that he was aware of the officer removing his jacket, that the officer had used a phaser to destroy the emergency survival jackets, that the officer had said, "I will now be second in command of the Enterprise under Bebram." The officer had on non-regulation snowshoes and carried a non-regulation pack. Cold blast as he left damaged panel unsecured, banging in the wind.

A touch on his face. That other pain again. "All done. Not regulation stuff but best I can do now. Packed all I could find around you. Doctor McCoy will know what to do for you when we get home."

Tried to speak, to open mouth to give orders. Jaw restrained. Blow from Bebram's officer. "Look, once we get home we will have a bout in which you can try to knock some logic into me. For now rest and let me do my job."

Slits to see through. Cabin of craft ruined. Medic bed stripped even of straps. Awareness of reclining to a sixty-three degree angle. Movement. Out of craft. Rallon pulling. Healing needed. Going home to Jim. Jim. Home. Taken care of. Need healilng.


	3. Chapter 3

When he had calmed James Kirk went to his quarters and accessed Officer Carl Rallon's file. The face was a face he had seen on the ship for a long time, an officer he had spoken with a few times. He was highly ranked in the Security Branch, higher even than Spock, yet classified as a Recoveries Expert. As Kirk read on it was clearly evident that he was not just a Recoveries Expert but his abilities and history of successful rescues had made him the Federation's best, so many seemingly impossible rescues listed with his only comment being it was his duty. This was the officer who had sparred with Spock helping him regain his strength while Bones had him in Sickbay for four standard weeks feeling as weak as a new born kitten after being exposed to some alien airborne virus. If Rallon had not sparred with Spock he would not have passed his annual fitness assessment: Kirk felt himself smile when he read that when asked by Doctor McCoy why he had allowed Spock to "beat the tar out him" when Rallon had been helped to Sickbay by Spock his reply had been "seemed a good idea at the time".

Twice Kirk stopped as he read the man's record. The list of citations, awards, medals, and commendations was more than impressive and this was no doubt a man would have easily have made a good captain. While he was a bit surprised Kirk had nodded to himself when he read that on many occasions the man had turned down promotion citing it would be too restrictive with no challenges and no fun. There were many notations of how he would "on occasion not accept the reality of a situation, would totally disregard orders and keep working till he dropped or found and retrieved officers he had set out to find and retrieve claiming to have misheard the direct orders of superior officers". Despite himself Kirk had smiled again at that knowing that that was a part of what most likely appeared on his own file, how often he had disregarded orders. The last notation was the reason he had been off the ship. Special medical care at Starbase Ten required after rescuing senior crew.

Quickly Kirk shut his eyes, he did not want to think of that nightmare. It had been yet another time when he thought he was going to have to watch Spock did and Spock had told him he had thought that he was going to have to watch him die. All that had saved them had been Rallon disobeying orders and trying something different. McCoy had been furious at them and at his own ability not to be able to help Rallons. Spock had simply nodded when Rallon had said his reason for trying his way to save them when both he and Spock had been sure there was no way, "I had what Mister Spock would call a partial hypotenuse and thought I would see if it would work as it seemed a good idea." It had worked but the cost he had paid.

No. he had to think of what he had to do now. The eulogies. They had to be done. They were the problem at hand.

His mind screamed at him that they were not the problem at hand but Commodore Bebram was,

Commodore Bebram was just going to go out with them on a survey run of the neutral zone between Starbase Nine and Ten with a stop at one of the colonies. Their orders had been to pick up Bebram at Starbase Nine, take him to Starbase Ten, leave Officer Rallon there for medical care, go to Felon Six to deliver some goods and see to what repairs they could assist with, return to Starbase Ten and collect Officer Rallon then return Commodore Babram to Starbase Nine. Babram would, unless there was an emergency, have full command of the ship. They had left Rallon at the medical facilities on Starbase Ten for the specialist treatment McCoy had said he could geat there while they took Bebram to the colony on Fergon Six. They were to be there for six days and everything had being going well.

On the second day Kirk had returned to the bridge to find a message from Starfleet command, "Commodore Bebram's request for Mister Spock to go with one of his officers to return Officer Rallon from Starbase Ten to the Enterprise accepted.

Bebram, again. He had been insistent that Spock go with his officer. So like the trained professional he was, Bebram had been able to justify it by pointing out how it would be best if somebody Rallon knew were present.

McCoy had even said, "Jim, he has a point. Rallon is still on some strong medication and is likely to be most disorientated for a few moments when he wakes. No telling how he would react if he woke in transit and was with a stranger."

Bebram. Bebram was almost always there but why? Bebram had requested he be on the routine survey, Bebram had been insistent that his officer go as pilot to get Rallon while they were on Fergon Six even though they had been told of the storm. Kirk slammed his hand down on his desk, Bebram had it all planned. It was all done as per regulations but it was all for his own gain. All Bebram would be waiting for him to make a mistake, to over-react, to do the slightest thing that would justifiably Bebram taking command of the ship. Bebram had known of the closeness he had with Spock, had known his one weak spot.

Remembering the calming techniques Spock had taught him Kirk calmed and had to wonder if Bones was right, if he was reading too much into it. They did occasionally have various higher ranked officers aboard for various reasons and various routes. It could all be a very bad accident. McCoy had told him that Bebram's officer was showing early signs of frostbite, had said that they had hit the hill, and that both Spock and Rallon were dead. The officer's official account was thorough and per regulations. All the details were there and indicated an accident. The senior echelon had accepted it.

_Not accept_. Not accept kept repeating in his mind.

Kirk sat back down and looked at Bebram's officer's statement about the accident. There was something about that officer's statement that did not seem right and Kirk felt strangely edgy about that. It was just something wrong with it. "Not being in a thick jacket the cold hit Mister Spock the hardest and the other officer was just out of the equation." He had not said they were dead and Kirk wondered what 'out of the equation' really meant. When Kirk had asked him what he meant Bebram was quick to reply, "He means the man just quit, Kirk. He was trying to spare you from having to face the fact that one of your officers accepted the situation and simply just quit trying."

That was it. From everything he had heard and read Kirk knew Rallon would not just quit. Bebram had clearly not read the officer's file or he would have known that he would not simply quit. Rallon would not quit. Spock would have been able to get into the emergency clothing before the cold affected him. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.


	4. Chapter 4

Movement. Stillness. Being alone. A friendly presence. Stop. Start. Night. Day. Constant low whistle. Cold face. Hand. That other pain. The tea and soup that had been hot now warm. He had seen Rallon fall, lay still, then get up and move on. Red stains on the snow. So much snow. Movement. Getting them home. Home. Jim. Those times Rallon lay still for so long he feared he would not get up.

He had to wait a moment then knew he had been like this for ninety-seven point three hours, over a hundred and four hours since the crash. He did not know where they were nor where Bebram's officer would be. If Bebram's officer said they were dead, he knew Jim would not believe it. Would never believe it. As he remembered seeing Bebram's officer in the craft it was obvious it had been planned. It was obvious he was going to survive and was leaving them to die. Jim would not believe it was an accident. Once Jim was in control of his emotions he would know it was no accident.

Rallon. He had to think of what he knew of Rallon. He had to be a Starbase Ten because of saving Jim and himself. He knew had it been any other officer one of them would have died if not both. Rallon refused to accept that reality. He had told them he would get them home. Home. The Enterprise. He knew that Tallon would not give up on getting them home. He had seen how each time Rallon fell it took him longer to get up. He could not remember seeing Rallon do more than take a sip of the hot liquids before continuing. Always moving. Feeling the ground ahead of him and moving on. With his jaw set he could not speak. He wanted to order Rallon to go on without him but knew he would not. He wanted to order Rallon to stop for a break but knew he would not. When they got back to the Enterprise he would look up Rallon's record as he felt he should know more about the man.

When. His Human side was letting him believe they would survive. His Human side or the certainty he had sensed about Rallon. There had been the pain but there had also been an overwhelming certainty they would get home.

Home. Jim was at home. He needed to think about the crash, about the possible reasoning behind it, about what the future would be. He did know that this time he would have to thank Rallon and realized he had not thanked him for the last rescue. Then Rallon had been sedated from the time they got back to the ship till he was sent to Starbase Ten.

He and Jim would find time to thank him together as well as separately. He and Jim together.


	5. Chapter 5

Doctor Leonard McCoy arrived at Kirk's door four hours after Kirk had left the meeting. He knew his Captain should be asleep but was not surprised to see him awake. He knew his friend's mind would not let him sleep. He knew his friend would be thinking of the whole situation but mainly of the loss of his friend, their friend. The whole situation was wrong, just plain wrong.

"Thought you could use one of these," he handed Kirk a steaming mug, "A hot toddy. Might help with the work."

"How, how would they die, Bones?" There was so much pain in the hazel eyes that looked at him.

"Out there in these conditions. I don't want to think about it."

Kirk nodded, looked at the glass in his hand then up at his Chief Medical Officer, "Bones, would Rallon just quit? Would he just give up?"

McCoy smiled, "After all the times he got you and Spock and who knows how many others out of some tight spots, the times he helped save others be they crew or people on the different planets he was on, you ask that? There is no way, no way at all, he would stop trying to save Spock if that is what you are asking about. He would have died trying to save him, Jim, you must know that. The medical staff was to have lightly sedated him for the trip as he had had a rough final assessment and had been a bit sore but if he were aware of the situation and if there was even the most remote of remote possibilities of him being able to do it he would not quit trying to save Spock."

"And we know that Spock does not like the cold but I am sure he would have had a jacket on, even in the craft, perhaps not a thick one, but he would have got to the emergency clothing before the cold hit him. So what am I missing? The whole thing is wrong." Kirk paced and looked at McCoy, "The whole thing is wrong."

"The officer said they had engine failure and went down too fast for to prepare for anything. You saw how battered he was."

"Yes," Kirk momentarily closed his eyes the looked back at the Doctor, "but I also saw he was wearing non-regulation snowshoes, had a non-regulation pack, and where, where on a shuttle are things stowed in relation to the pilot? He was the pilot."

"Now wait, I have to picture this. To get to the storage area from," McCoy looked at him and Kirk saw McCoy was realizing what he thought. "There is no way. He had to have had them ready. If he's part of getting the Enterprise with Bebram that means he had to have,"

"Waited for the storm to arrive, get clearance as it was a short flight and he had the rating for flying in all conditions. He crashed deliberately and left Spock and Rallon to die." Kirk paced around. "Bebram's behind all this. Waiting for me to do what I want to do. I saw how he was waiting for me to really react when they called off the search. If you and the others had not been there I would have done something that would have given him the ship."

"They had to call it off at some point, Jim."

"I know. I know but," Kirk kept seeing again that one line on Rallon's records, "Rallon's wouldn't give up and nor would Spock unless,"

"Unless?"

"What that officer said, about Spock not being in a jacket."

"Going out in that storm Spock would have worn one, even in the craft."

"So why did the officer say without a jacket?"

McCoy gripped his friend's shoulder, "He possibly meant a cold weather jacket. It has been five days, Jim. Out there, without a cold weather jacket, he would not have lasted long. We cannot get ahead of ourselvess here. Bebram has an impressive history. I know things look like he could be behind it but what real proof do we have? It could have been fairly fast and an accident."

"Rallon?"

"Well the medical report cleared him for very restricted light basic duties aboard for six months with daily exercises, then restricted specialized duties for six months and then regular duties. Getting you two out of that last escapade really knocked him about and caused some severe spinal and nervous system damage that needed procedures I am not skilled enough to do." Kirk looked at his friend when he was quiet and saw sadness and disappointment around the blue eyes, "I do not usually have patients who last as long as he did with the damage he sustained. Like I said, the specialist said they would lightly sedate him for the trip so that would have meant he would sleep for the trip. I am glad for if he had been awake he would have tried to help Spock. He possibly went to sleep and just never woke up."

Kirk nodded and place a hand on his friend's arm, "We are the emotional ones, Bones. What do you feel? Forgetting all the proof, forgetting all but your gut?"

McCoy placed a hand on his shoulder, "I feel that pointy-eared green blood hobglobbin will turn up just to point out that my medical skills are from the stoneage. I feel that Rallon will turn up and complain that the beds there are better than I have here."

"I know, Bones. I have two eulogies to do in eight hours and deep in me, Bones, I know they are alive out there."

"I'll go fix us another Toddy and help you with the eulogies."

"Bones, you don't have to. I, "

"You are not going to get them done in time at this rate."

Kirk's door buzzer sounded and in walked the rest of his senior crew, each bringing either liquids or food, "We thought you might like to hear some of our stories and we wanted to be with you."

"I," Kirk started to protest.

Uhura walked up to him, gave him a comforting hug and said, "Families should be together at times like this."

"My favorite memory of the two of them was when they had been sparring. When you were unable, Captain. Spock thought he had him but somehow Rallon turned right around on him and had him on his back and helpless in no time. Spock told him it was a most illogical move and Rallon said, "It worked and that's what counts." And then Spock asked him to teach him the move saying it was only logical to do so."

"And vot about the time ven Mister Spock realized he might not make the pass level for fitness after the accident that saw the Keptin kept in SickBay. He and Rallon had worked out him in the gym and gone on that cross country run. Rallon told him it was a run but did not tell him it vas a cross country double marathon with over thirty major obstacles to get over, around, through, or under. In the end it vas Mister Spock helping him home."

"Ah, there was that time Mister Spock got caught in a tavern and was going to have to drink a lot of spirits and Rallon went in acting as his partner in crime and out drank the six men who had Mister Spock and then Mister Spock had to carry one very sick officer back to the ship and when they got on board Rallon kissed him and said, 'Good night my lovely lady' before passing out in the Transporter Room."

Kirk quietly sat listening to the stories and memories but kept thinking of his best friend being out in the blizzard. He could not get anybody to believe he was alive. They were all talking about the past.

"Yes, but he did not go to many functions or parties as he was always on watch even when he wasn't. Sort of like the alpha male watching over a pack or herd. Always watching." Uhura said then looked into the cup of coffee she was holding, "No matter where the female crew went on the different planets they always felt safe if they knew he was around. He was there but you never really saw him."

"Wait, wait do any of you remember,"

There was a buzz from his com station, "Kirk here."


	6. Chapter 6

"Kyle in Transport, Sir. You best come down."

"Kyle?"

"Now, sir." It was not often that any officer was so emphatic and Kirk started for the door.

"Bones, with me, the rest of you,"

"Oh no, if you go we go,"

"It's most likely nothing."

"We'll check with you then."

As the doors into the Transporter Room opened Kirk stopped and those behind him were quiet for a moment then all of them rushed the platform.

Kirk looked from Spock bundled up in a ball to Rallon barely standing wearing hardly anything. Just for a moment as Kirk walked up to him there seemed to be some awareness in the brown eyes, "Spock's safe,home, Sir," then he pitched forward and Kirk only just caught him as he collapsed.

Scotty, Sulu, and Uhura all huddled around helping McCoy remove all the material that had been packed around Spock as Kirk lowered Rallon to the floor and took a thermal blanket from Chekov to wrap around Rallon.

Kirk looked at McCoy as he waved the mediscanner over Spock, "In the Vulcan trance, hardly hypothermic at all, a bit dehydrated and obviously hasn't eaten in a few days. Splinted as he has been protected him from spinal injury and his jaw no longer needs splinting. A few days bed rest and he should be fine from what I can tell."

McCoy moved over to where Kirk had lain Rallon, "Oh, here we have another story," he pointed to where straps had cut deep into his shoulders and some sort of wide band had rubbed deep into his chest and upper abdomen. "Damned fool," McCoy waved the scanner over him several times. "Kyle, Emergency Kit F, now."

Kirk moved and sat beside Spock, hugging the Vulcan while he watched McCoy tilt Rallon's head back and inserted a tube into his mouth. Kyle handed him a mug of hot liquid that McCoy poured down the tube, "Need four more, now." Uhura got up and moved so she could quickly hand the mugs from Kyle to McCoy. "Okay, everyone, this will get messy so you may as well leave." Instead of leaving Scotty and Sulu went over to help McCoy, Kyle and Uhura with the mugs while Chekov sat with Kirk and Spock ready to help move the unconscious Science Officer should the need arise. As McCoy pulled out the tube a lot of the liquid came out as well, "Keep it coming Kyle. He's not out of it yet." Two more times McCoy poured the hot liquid into the tube and let flow out then stopped and waved the scanner over him again, "Damn! Dammit! Still way too low."

Kirk looked at the unconscious officer and at McCoy who just slightly shook his head. Kirk looked around then gently laid Spock against Chekov, stripped off his shirt, picked up the nearly nude Rallon, and carried him into the decontamination unit. "Turn it up the heat gradually." The temperature started, Kirk knew, at a chill zero Celsius but Kirk knew that that would be warm compared to what Rallon had been in. As he hed the trembling body Kirk did not want to think what would have happened if Rallon had not protected from the cold. What would have happened if any other officer had been with Spock. Carefully adjusting his hold on Rallon. As he thought of what had happened to his friend Kirk swore that he would ensure that Bebram's officer would pay for what he did to Spock, for what Rallon was suffering.

Very gradually the temperature climbed and Kirk was pleased he had taken off his shirt before as he felt his uniform pants sticking to him. He was aware of the perspiration dripping down his face. He looked at the form in his arms and said a silent prayer that the body under the thin sheet was being warmed. He glanced at the gauge; McCoy had slowly raised the temperature to thirty-one Celsius. At first he had not fully understood why McCoy had poured the hot liquid into Rallon but he knew that it had been to warm him from the inside. This was warming him from the outside. McCoy would have more treatments to try.

When he looked up and out through the window saw the others waiting and saw a fresh uniform laid out for him. This was more than his crew, this was his family. McCoy held up ten fingers and Kirk nodded. McCoy would let him out in ten minutes but Kirk knew he would hold that slightly trembling body for as long as it took.

When the ten minutes ended Scotty took the limp body from him and carried it to the bed McCoy had prepared as Uhura handed him a towel and fresh uniform while indicating the small bathroom.

McCoy had Rallon wrapped in a warming sheet when Kirk walked over, feeling much better so many ways. "His core temperature is still under the safe side but is now on the way back up." McCoy looked from the scanner to Kirk, "I'll know more about the extent of his other injuries later."

Kirk had not missed the slight lowing of his friend's head and placed a hand on his shoulder, "Bones?"

"He should be in Sickbay but,"

"But what?"

"Captain," Uhura looked at McCoy who still had not looked at Kirk then at her captain, "we might be wrong but we think Bebram is behind this and wants the ship."

Internally Kirk swore at himself, for just that moment of knowing Spock was safe he had forgotten about Bebram and his role in this.

"McCoy and I feel the same."

McCoy now looked at Kirk and Kirk saw the pain in his friend, "That is why we need to keep both of them out of Sickbay. That officer of his turns up periodically claiming to still feel unwell yet he just looks around as though searching for some sign of something."

Anger flared in Kirk. His friend and Rallon needed to be in Sickbay but with Bebram around and knowing what he seemed willing to do they could not risk using Sickbay. They had to wait, wait and let Bebram do something to incriminate himself.

"So put Spock in my quarters," Uhura looked at Kirk and for a moment she clearly saw his shock. "It is not a place Bebram would think of looking if he thought of anything. Christine could check on him without raising suspicion."

"Aye, and Rallon can go in mine as I'll be in Engineering. Whatever is needed can be taken there and nae a question asked as often have taken faulty equipment to my quarters to fix or improve. Till the lad no longer watching I could have one of my,"

"No, Scotty, I would roster medical staff there. You have the best engineering folk but, but he is in serious condition and needs medical care. I'll have him connected to a system that warms his blood as it circulates through it. It is not a big piece of equipment." McCoy looked back at Spock briefly and then longer at Rallon.

"Bones?"

"Bebram would not be suspicious of Christine going to Uhura's quarters nor of M'Benga going to Scotty's as often as he will need to till this is all sorted." McCoy nodded, "It would work, Jim."

Kirk looked at them, he had always known he had a great crew but this went beyond that. This was even more than friends. What they were going to do went against so many regulations. As he looked at each one he realized that these were more than just crew and friends, this was his family. This was a family.

"As Uhura said, ye need family at a time like this. We will get them settled. Uhura will stay with Spock till Nurse Chapel can get to him and while Doctor M'Benga gets what he needs I will be with Rallon." For a moment the man was silent and Kirk realized they all looked at him as he nodded. "We best nae forget Bebram may suspect something if we are all away for a long time."

Kirk nodded, his Chief Engineer was right. Bebram might get suspicious if all of them were missing or returned at the same time. All they needed was for Bebram to come out and give any indication he was behind it, that he was planning on taking the Enterprise at any cost. They needed him to admit that he was willing to have Spock and Rallon killed to reach his goal.

While the others took care of getting Rallon and Spock settled Kirk went back to the meeting room and saw how Bebram looked at him, "Anything to report? I was informed you had to go to the Transporter Room."

"No. It was just something I had asked Officer Kyle to check for me. Seems it was just a fluctuation of some sort. It is in the reports. Now, if you will excuse me I will check in with the bridge and then finish those two eulogies I have to take care of."

Bebram gave him a smile others would think as understanding and sympathetic but Kirk noticed just the slight turn up on the corners and knew it was a smile of thought supremacy and cunning.

It pleased Kirk that the others had returned to the bridge several minutes apart so as to not look suspicious. Kirk knew with them all back that M'Benga would be with Rallon and Nurse Chapel would check on Spock without suspicion. His crew was aware of Bebram having brought three officers with him so with the one who had been on the craft meant there were two others aboard who would be reporting to Bebram.

For a moment Kirk felt uneasy. Although there was one of them was just standing on the bridge just watching that left one walking around on his ship. One who would be watching, listening, and reporting to Bebram.

Uhura looked at him in a way that Kirk knew meant she had something to tell him but did not want the stranger to know about. He walked over to her and she looked at him, "Report, Lieutenant."


	7. Chapter 7

Cold. Stillness. Day. Spock could not recall ever being so cold for so long. He knew had he not had all the insulating material around him he would have frozen to death. He knew if Bebram's officer had made it to the base that Jim would be wanting to be out looking for them but he knew in these conditions such searches were against regulations. If they had transponders then they could. There had been nothing to make,

"Tracker. Your name. My initials. Kyle knows." The hand again. That deep pain of another. Cold hand putting something in his shirt. Rallon. His voice sounding strained, tired. "Soon close enough. You can bring up charges when home. Soon home. So tired. Not much longer. I'll sleep then. You rest."

Movement. Still many stops and starts. Rallon fell more often but not so much blood on snow when he got up. So many possible reasons. Spock sipped the now jst tepid tea and soup and started to think of why Rallon would not be bleeding so much. The cold was clearly making Rallon delusional if he thought he could make a transponder out of nothing.

No he had heard Mister Scott say Rallon was more of a miracle worker than he was in many ways. But there was nothing that he could make a transmitter lest alond transponder from. There was nothing on the craft.

The craft. The wreckage he had seen. He recalled what he had seen. The panels that appeared to have had been torn apart. The exposed circuitry that the crash would not have caused. But Rallon was not an engineer. Mentally the Science Officer thought of what parts would be needed to make anything closely resembling a small transmitter. There was the movement of the sled.

There was the familiar tingling of a transporter. The bright lights of the room. Jim. McCoy, the others. Jim. Jim walking up to him. Jim. Home. Jim. He could heal now.


	8. Chapter 8

Uhura looked up at her Captain, looking him straight in the eyes, "All quiet, Sir. Officer Seymour has ensured Officer Molar had a good meal and will be in Bionics for a few hours helping with the beds." From the slight nod she gave him after she had briefly looked away Kirk knew the other officer had not noticed anything odd in the conversation but Kirk had fully understood. While Kirk had been sure his crew would have kept an eye on the others he had been unsure as to how he would know where they were. His family had clearly worked out how to deal with them. With the one on the bridge, the one with Bebram, the only other one was now asleep in the Bionics room. Kirk knew he would relax more if he could see Spock, know that he was safe.

"Nothing else to report?"

Uhura looked at him and they both saw how the officer now looked at them, "No, Sir. Nothing else to report. It is all clear all the way."

Clear to her quarters. Kirk smiled to himself. Bebram's men had no idea what was going on aboard the ship they were on, his ship. But he needed to get to see Spock.

As he looked at his Communications Officer he tried to think of how. There had to be, "Lieutenant, did you bring that disc I asked for,"

Just as he had hoped Uhura looked surprised and guilty, "No, Sir, if want I will,"

He raised his hand, "No, with your permission I will go into your quarters and get it."

Kirk saw how she quickly glanced at Chekov then back at Kirk, "You have my permission," Chekov started to stand, "Sit down, Chekov! I said the Captain could go into my quarters and I meant only the Captain."

The way the stranger had half-smiled and shook his head let Kirk know he had believed what he had just seen. Let Kirk know he was incapable of deciphering the hidden meanings to statements. Bebram had incompetents working for him.

Kirk paused as he entered Uhura's quarters as one of the younger nurses had a phaser in her hands that she lowered as Nurse Chapel looked at him. "It is set on stun." She looked at the other nurse, "Let's go have a cup of coffee, Sharon. We will be gone for about an hour. Leave the phaser." Nurse Chapel looked back at him then at Spock, "There has been no change. He is still deep in a Vulcan healing trance. There is no way anybody I do not know is getting near him. Sulu ensured my skills at handling the phaser were up to the level he would let me have one here." She smiled at him, "Sulu said not to wait, to pick it up the moment the door started to open till I saw who it was. When you came I was adjusting the blanket on Mister Spock."

Despite himself Kirk smiled. No doubt she was almost constantly adjusting the blanket. "Thank you. I will be here while you are gone."

Kirk walked to the bed and saw how relaxed his friend now seemed. It was clear to him, having seen Spock in many healing trances over the years, that this was a very deep trance so he must have been injured more than he had been told. As he sat beside the bed he reached out and took hold of his friend's hand. He knew that Spock would be able to tell them exactly what had happened but for now he was just content to hold his best friend's hand. He was so relieved to be with his friend again he lowered his head and rested it on his hands that encircled Spock's.

There was a familiar whirring sound and a familiar voice said, "All normal. He's in a healing trance. Rallon knew how to protect him. He had strained neck and upper back muscles and that backboard and neck support prevented it from being a lot worse. His jaw was only slightly dislocated so that splinting was of some use. You got the two eulogies figured out?"

When he looked up and shook his head there was total understanding about the two blue eyes looking back at him. "And before you ask Rallon is showing minimal response to treatment but it will be a very long, long time before he gets back to even the condition he was in when we sent him for the work. So much for light duties. Oh," there was a friendly squeeze on his shoulder, "Scotty's bed will need replacing as we had to slightly modify it."

Kirk nodded, "Slightly?"

"I was hesitant about doing it but Scotty soon had it done saying Rallon needed it." McCoy smiled and looked a Kirk. Kirk could see the warmth in the smile but Kirk knew this man too well, there was something his friend was not saying, something that was deeply troubling him.

"Bones, what is it?"

"It can wait."

"Now, Bones. I can see it is eating at you."

"After your eulogies you will have to sign Rallon off the ship."

"Off the ship? You just said,"

"This time he pushed himself too far. All that repair muscular skeletal work he went off ship for is stretched, shredded, and torn almost beyond repair. His digestive system has almost totally shut down. I am amazed with all the damage to his nervous system that he could move at all. Remember seeing the wounds on his chest?"

Kirk nodded as he remembered how he had seen them and realized what had caused them. Obviously he had missed something significant about them. "What?"

"There was infection in the bone marrow. He had cracked seven of them and the constant rubbing and pressure." McCoy closed his eyes and shook his head. "I got that under control but," he let out a long slow breath then met Kirk's gaze, "He does have a steady heartbeat and is breathing on his own but that is about all. He is looking at months, if not years, of intensive rehabilitation. You earlier asked about him quitting. He has to now." Kirk saw his friend close his eyes and shake his head, "I've only seen conditions like this two times before, both times the officers died because they mentally gave up. He has pushed himself far beyond his physical limits and his body is ready to quit but his mind simply will not allow it. Damned if I why. When you have read his medical report you will have to sign him,"

"Spock can't be told that. You know he would blame himself, you know how he would react. There has to be,"

"Jim, a body, human or Vulcan, can only take so much before it reached a breaking point, a point at which there is no hope of return to any form of normalcy. He pushed his beyond that, so far beyond that this time." The hand that was still on his shoulder patted it gently then squeezed it. "We can discuss this after the service. I'll find the best facility for him. Your eulogies should be very interesting. You go get some rest, I'll sit with him."

This time it was easy for Kirk to mentally draft the eulogies. He knew just what he would say, what he had to say. This time he knew how to catch Bebram as long as Bebram gave him just the smallest of an opening.

As he was getting dressed he looked at the appropriate black armband and left it where it was. When he got to the hall they had arranged he was surprised that none of the others were there but saw Bebram, his officer, and a few of the dignitaries from the night before. He walked over to where two images were displayed.

"I thought it best to have their official images on display. They were both good officers. It will be difficult for you to find better but you will. You must. Part of the perils of the position, Captain, is you lose good officers in bad accidents."

One of the delegation members came over and looked up at Kirk, "I did not really know First Officer Spock but had heard a great deal about him while Officer Rallon could dance the night away and it did not matter the music nor who he danced with. My husband remembers how they had been out exploring a new pass over the ridge at our last posting and how he had tripped and Rallon had carried him twenty kilometers home and went with me that night to a formal and I remember how we danced every dance as I loved, and still do, to dance. You must miss them both."

He had given a quick nod and she looked at Bebram, "Your officer did not give us many details but he was sure neither of them would have suffered nor lasted long. It is amazing he survived."

"Yes, but it is tragic the other two died. We are here to remember their lives and not how they died."

"Yes, their lives."

The music started and Kirk knew it was time for him to stand between the two representative caskets. Bebram and his officer slowly walked up and as Bebram placed his hand on the casket representing Spock Kirk saw a subtle but undeniable look victory in his eyes. Others came and then he saw his senior crew walk in, McCoy leading. They did not, as protocol stated was the accepted form, pass one by one but when all five were before the caskets they, almost like a synchronized unit, turned their backs to the coffins, half turned and nodded to him. Only then had he realized that none of them were wearing the black armbands either. They then walked to their seats.

Their action surprised him and he could tell from how Bebram looked that it had surprised him, "I had not expected such a display but it is understandable. It is difficult to accept death when there are no bodies, no evidence of death, and when it is the death of one close. The sole survivor of this tragic accident that claimed the lives of two outstanding officers can attest to the fact that Officer Rallot would have died not knowing it and that First Officer Spock would not have suffered long as it is known Vulcans are not used to colder climates."

Bebram paused and looked at Kirk, "But for some the loss will be greater than we can imagine. Captain Kirk has always been close to his crew and especially to his senior officers. There used to be a saying that the command crew of the Enterprise was the Significant Seven. That is now the Saddened Six. But as you look at them in this time of great sadness you can see they are still strong. Kirk," this time Kirk realized the look was personal, "you have lost one, you still have the others."

Almost all his control was gone and he knew Bebram was baiting him he was close to losing control. Bebram wanted him to react. If he reacted how Bebram was goading him to he would lose the ship, he would be classified as unstable. As Bebram had said to him earlier that losing crew was part of the price for being a starship captain he knew he would remain in control for he had not lost his men: he had not lost Spock.

Now Bebram looked at him and Kirk could see that look of supremacy about him. To the others it would not be so noticeable but Kirk saw the almost imperceptible smug look of one who thought they were the victor. "I am sure that all here know you lost a part of you with the death of your Vulcan First Officer as it was known how close you were but you still have the rest. You lost, Kirk. Oh, what you lost."

For just a moment his control relaxed and Kirk took one step and suddenly stopped as one beautifully melodious and familiar voice filled the room,

"I feel you are here beside me now. I feel you hold my hand in yours I feel you touch my fevered brow I feel you lift me from all chores I know you are gone yet you are here"

Everybody was mesmerized as Uhura stood and walked to stand in front of the casket representing Rallon, "I know you have things you must attend I know you'll forgive me if I shed a tear," she put her hand on the casket representing Rallon and rested it there, "I know for certain you're my forever friend," she looked at Kirk and gave him a smile as she placed her other hand on the casket that was representative of Spock, "You are my forever friend." Kirk gave her a nod they both knew was in thanks of helping him regain control and for what they both felt for their special friend.

"Well, that," Bebram looked out and Kirk could tell he was seeing what the reaction of the echelon was before he continued, "That was a very fitting tribute. I think now would be the best of times to hand proceedings over to Captain Kirk."

James Kirk slowly got on the podium, "Yes, and thank your for that, Lieutenant Uhura. I am sure all of us can relate to those words. I spent a good portion of last night after a senor crew meeting reflecting on the recent events, on the possible fate of two officers from the Enterprise, and of the minds of those men, the tenacious natures of them, of how very different yet so alike they are."

He heard Bebram whisper, "Were, Kirk, they are dead."

"I thought of how well they work together and of how they are a most formidable team together despite their innumerable differences. There seems to be nothing they simply can not accomplish when together. To think of them together in the craft in that crash, in that crash." He paused and lowered his head as he gave silent thanks that they were together. Until that moment he had not thought of what the outcome might have been if they had not been together, if Rallon had not been there.

"Clearly Captain Kirk is overwrought and is having difficulty handling an event starship captains have to be able to handle. He is having difficulty in accepting the death of crewmembers as evidenced in his use of the present tense. I am aware that losing two outstanding officers would be most upsetting but,"

Kirk tried to hide his anger at Bebram as he lifted his head and looked at him before looking at his crew then the others gathered, "I was actually just thinking of them together in that craft in that crash. I was wondering what it would have been like. So many times they challenged one another mentally and physically. Times like a double marathon just to get Spock fit enough to pass his annual fitness test after he had been seriously ill, sparring together and neither man willing to quit till they were both sprawled on the floor in total exhaustion and in need of Doctor McCoy's assistance, almost endless mental games. So many times."

Just for a moment he remembered some of the part-conversations he had heard them in, how Spock had explained them as on-going mental games, how Spock had often said he enjoyed the challenges Rallon offered.

"Times like," he took a deep breath, looked around and realized they would all think him distraught. "Times like," again he stopped, for once not knowing how to continue. He had to remain calm.

A quiet voice sounded at the back of his mind, "Control, Jim. Control." And for a moment he closed his eyes. For too long he had not heard that voice. For too long he thought it had been silenced forever.


	9. Chapter 9

Warmth. Pain. A hand slapping him. He gripped the hand, "Thank you, doctor." He stopped himself from saying McCoy as he recognized M'Benga.

"Good to have you back, Mister Spock."

As he looked around the room Spock realized it was Lieutenant Uhura's quarters. No doubt to stop Bebram from knowing he was back.

"Rallon?"

There was a slight pause before M'Benga answered that let Spock know that whatever the doctor said would not be the full truth. "He is resting. He is McCoy's patient."

"Where is he?"

"In Mister Scott's quarters till are they get Bebram into custody."

Spock nodded, it was a logical action to take.

"Where are the others?" Even as he asked the Vulcan knew they would be at a memorial service.

"At the main hall." M'Benga looked at him, "Uhura had your uniform brought here."

He had accepted the doctor's assistance to stand and then got himself dressed and headed for Mister Scott's quarters with Doctor M'Benga walking with him, "I have been with him since you two were brought aboard. McCoy sees him every two hours."

As they entered M'Benga said, "Just me with Mister Spock and Spock saw another nurse with another phaser. Clearly the crew was not going to let Bebram nor any of his men near Rallon just as they had been guarding him.

Spock recognized the machine warming Rallon's blood, carefully lifted the blanket and saw the inflamed marks on the exposed chest. Cautiously he placed a hand on the side of Rallon's face, quickly removing it as he had not been fully prepared for the level of pain Rallon was in despite being heavily medicated.

"We cannot give him any more without risking his life." M'Benga had clearly known what he had done and sensed.

"I will assist later. He can now be safely moved to Sickbay. There is a matter I must attend to now."

There was no doubt in Spock's mind that the crew would have kept Bebram and his men under observation and that M'Benga would have told him had there been any risk of him being seen on the ship but once he was off the ship he was more cautious.

Unnoticed he had entered through a service door and had stood in the shadows listening to Bebram and then hearing the way Jim was trying to sound distraught. The way Uhura's singing had stopped his friend from reacting to the goading.

Cautiously he parted the curtain enough to be able to see Jim. It took all the control he had not to rush out and comfort his friend as Jim was clearly trying to remain calm, was trying to figure a way to trapping Bebram, but was also too emotional to fully concentrate. Briefly he closed his eyes, "Control, Jim. Control."


	10. Chapter 10

Confidently Bebram stepped up, "I am sure what Captain Kirk was going to say is that there were many times when his two officers had worked together and how very difficult it is for him to think that they are dead and they would never work together again. He should find some comfort in the fact that at least they died on the mountain together."

"I believe you are very prematurely mistaken about that aspect, Commodore Bebram, as I am obviously not dead and neither is Officer Rallon. I am also certain that the Captain was going to say times like when the two of us were left on a mountain to die in an orchestrated accident but we worked together and survived." The look on most faces was a mix of relief and amazement but when Kirk looked at Bebram it was a blend of total shock, anger and bridled fury. "Times like when I was too cold and unable to do a thing to help a fellow officer because I was wrapped in various parts of his uniform, protected from the freezing cold by whatever he had used to insulate me from the cold with. Times like when I had to watch as he devised snow goggles for each of us, a sled to move me on, and a crude harness for him to use to pull the sled."

There was almost total stillness and silence in the room as Spock walked very slowly and deliberately up to the podium and looked at the officer next to Bebram, "Times of being aware that, although I was stunned by the crash, a blow to my jaw from your fist, and the injected sedative you gave me, I was not dead as I watched you equip yourself with non-regulation snowshoes, clothing, and a survival pack before leaving Officer Rallon and myself without checking to see if we were alive. Times like repeatedly watching, over a five day period, an injured fellow officer repeatedly fall to the snow, in total exhaustion, then watch him struggle to get back up somehow just to get us home."

Pandemonium broke out with cheers and Kirk felt the longed for close and tight embrace from his best friend, heard again that beloved baritone voice as Spock whispered, "Jim. It is good to see you again. We will have time later. Rallon will now be in Sickbay with M'Benga but he does need McCoy." Slowly the other five senior crewmembers from the Enterprise walked to the podium and stood behind Kirk and Spock.

"No! No! This is not how it was to be." There was suddenly a silence as those there turned to see Bebram glaring at his officer, shaking a pointed finger at him and raging, "You said they were dead! You said you destroyed the emergency clothing to ensure the Vulcan would die in the cold. You were to have killed them. The others told me the crew believed them dead. Kirk did. All you had to do was kill them. I would get Kirk so riled he would assault me and the Enterprise would be mine. Mine! You just had to kill them. You told me you had it all planned. You said you could make the crash look like an accident. You just had to kill them."

"Is the other officer,"

"How did you,"

Questions came at them from all around the room. Security officers rushed to be beside Bebram.

Kirk raised his hands to quiet the uproar that had started with Bebram's open admission, "Please, please, some silence. Please." When the people had settled Kirk looked at Spock. They had the admission but he could see the Vulcan had not finished.

"All, all I have been told of Officer Rallon's condition is that he is presently in a stable but extremely critical condition. I awoke with the help of Doctor M'Benga one point three five hours ago and was advised of the situation. I clearly remember only nine point six hours of the trip down from the craft. I have vague recollections of events throughout the crash and subsequent descent from the crash but could not, with certainty, say if they were in order after leaving the ruined craft. I remember watching Officer Rallon struggle to get out of the bed, him using his bare hands to get whatever he could to insolate me from the cold, to make snow goggles from, to use as ropes to form a crude harness to pull me, to get us home."

Seldom had Kirk seen such deep loathing in his friend's expression let alone hear it in his voice as when Spock turned, took a step forward and glared at the officer beside Bebram, "You, Sir, are obviously totally incompetent of performing such a simple, basic task as murdering two unarmed and injured officers. You clearly lack the elementary mental ability to think through a project as fundamentally uncomplicated as this would have been. It is clearly evident that you dismally failed to give any thought to the wide range of random factors that could influence the outcome of your plan although they were there before you. You were abysmally infantile in completing the tasks needed for a successful ending to your obvious assignment, leaving too much to chance. Just two examples of your blindness to the reality of the situation can be seen from your actions immediately after the crash when you were preparing to leave the craft. It was asinine stupidity to not remove the blanket that was covering Officer Rallon and only the most ineffectual bunglers would have left him his bag, both of which he made full use of in my rescue."

There was near panic in the young officer's face as Spock took another step closer and continued, "While I have some recollection of events I have been able to put together the events as they would have taken place based on the evidence you left and that is still largely there or on the Enterprise for the investigation team to have a look at. I was helpless and he struggled and managed to get out of the cot after you left. He fell to the floor and lay there before he could move and then he clearly took his uniform from his bag and put it on me, wrapped the pillow around my hands, wrapped a shirt packed with oddments of clothing from his bag around my boots for extra protection, wrapped me in the blanket and removed enough of the stuffing from the thin mattress to fit me in it so he could use the mattress cover as a shell because of the thickness of its covering. All his things he did to and for me were planned so that I did not move my neck or put pressure on my back thus lessening any pain and any possibility of spinal injury, going so far as to strap a broken chair back to me to immobilize my head and upper spine. He also splinted my jaw that you dislocated when you struck me after injecting a strong sedative into my thigh.

"Only my face was exposed and he managed to make snow goggles for us both. He found the first aid kit and used a tube of cream on my face to protect it from the cold. He found sharp metal to cut the restraints that had held him to the cot to make a crude harness a harness that cut through his shirt and deep into him as he dragged me."

Kirk could see how Spock was struggling to control his anger, saw how often his friend flexed his fingers as a way of maintaining some control, "I must applaud your planning as to the crash as you did indicated you knew where to crash and how to as it took you only three days to get down the hill yet it took us five. You were methodical in ensuring to remove the two other thermal suits and destroying them outside the craft so the melting snow would remove any trace of a phaser burn.

"You, you were prepared with a headband light so you could travel safely at night. At night he would take one step at a time and pause to make sure it would hold his weight before he slowly pulled me forward. You could maintain a steady pace while he had to alter his for the times when I would slide into him and knock him over, when he had to pull me over crevices. You did not have to helplessly watch a fellow officer fall and wonder if he would be able to get up, wonder at what was keeping him going. You even had warm sustenance supplies while he had only a five liter insulated canister of hot coffee and a five liter insulated canister of hot vegetable soup that he made me drink to maintain my core temperature while he had perhaps a mouthful a day from each. You were alone and unencumbered while he would not leave me and risked his own safety by hauling me with him."

There was a moment's silence as Spock turned and looked at Bebram and Kirk was sure that everybody present saw how he seemed to shrink back into his seat at Spock took a step forward. "You, Sir, selected the wrong starship to want to take as your own. You selected a bungling incompetent who was unable to complete such a simple task as causing a fatal crash. You were aware of Captain Kirk's dedication to his crew and his crew to him and you believed that with the right pressure applied to him while he was dealing with the human emotional aspects of such a loss you would show him to be unstable and therefore incapable of fulfilling his duties as a starship captain. You selected the wrong pair to attempt to kill. You had all the personnel records at your disposal and yet you selected Officer Rallon and myself. That was a gross oversight. You possibly believed that Officer Rallon would have been sedated and therefore not a threat yet he was, in fact, your biggest threat. Had you taken the time, that Captain Kirk would have to find out what a sedated officer like Officer Rallon was like, you would have learned that the only times that Officer Rallon is not a threat is when he is as he is now: in an induced coma, secured to a medical bed and wth a full medical team with him along with an armed security officer."

Bebram was almost shaking when Spock took a slight step back. For a moment Spock as still and silent and Kirk could see he was on the verge of losing control before the other five walked up one by one to form a semi-circle around him with their arms linked as though shielding him as well as supporting him. It seemed to reassure Spock and for a moment he looked at each one of them in turn and gave each a slight nod of thanks then at Kirk who also stepped up and linked his left arm with McCoy's.

Jim Kirk found it difficult to remember a time when he had seen his friend so furious and yet so worried. Only on perhaps two occasions had he seen such a murderous look about those so expressive dark eyes. They looked at each other for but a moment before each gave the other an understanding nod. The Vulcan took a deep breath, stood straight and looked first at Bebram then back at the officer and shook his head and, when he turned to look at the six of them, almost smiled his knowing smile which made Kirk momentarily smile to himself as it was most unusual for him to show any emotion in public even before those he knew so well. Suddenly Kirk knew that Spock had not finished with the young officer nor Bebram.


	11. Chapter 11

As Spock turned Kirk watched the full Vulcan mask slipped into place. "You must know that your plan was never, never going to succeed. I will explain it to you in five very simple steps. I will attempt to use a rudimentary human level of elementary logic so you just might be able to comprehend the reasons as to why you were doomed to fail. If I detect it is too difficult for you to understand what I am saying I will change my selection of vocabulary till I find the level at which you understand what I am saying. The first four steps could possibly have assured you of success, even though the odds of that occurring are too small to waste time calculating. It is the fifth and final steps, yet such a fundamental step, that was what you incredulously had not counted upon and that did, in fact, lead to your ultimate failure."

Spock paused for a moment and looked at his shipmates, at Bebram, then back at the officer, "Firstly you had full blizzard clothing and survival supplies while all he had on was a thick shirt, some gloves, some slacks and a pair of standard issue boots worn aboard a ship. Secondly you are relatively healthy and he was returning to the ship after extensive medical treatment. Thirdly you had navigational equipment and he just had nature and innate animal instincts. The fourth point is you followed orders and he followed his nature and his," for a moment Spock closed his eyes and was silent.

"Spock?" Kirk whispered but he knew the Vulcan had heard.

There was just the slightest of nods before the dark eyes looked at him then turned to focus again on the officer next to Bebram, "his so very human emotions and illogic. Finally that fifth step. You totally overlooked it for some obscure reason. Perhaps you were mesmerized by a vision of a future you believed would be yours. What brought about your total failure, Sir, was the fact that you believed the vision of a promised shiny new role and illustrious future to be a reality to come back to." Spock paused and looked Bebram, "This is the thing that made the promise. This is the thing that made you believe what it knew you wanted to believe. You dismally failed to realize that it was a promise made by a thing that would do anything, anything at all including murder, to reach its own goals." The Vulcan took another breath and shook his head, then looked levelly at the junior officer who seemed to shrink back into his chair, "You believed in that illusion, that dream, that lie he had told you could be your future and it was all you had to keep you going. You just had that fantasy and nothing more, nothing that was real or substantial."

Spock took a step back which, for a moment seemed to make the young man relax. The Vulcan just looked at him and shook his head again, "What an exceptional pawn you made for him. You had only that illusion and now have nothing while Carl Rallon had," Spock looked at Kirk then slowly at the other five bridge crew with him then back at the officer, "and still has the reality of not just our friendship and loyalty but also that of the complement of the starship Enterprise."

As one, with arms linked, the seven started to walk out but Spock stopped and turned. The security officers were standing with Bebram and the officer as Spock walked up to stand only centimeters from the officer and looked down at him, "Know this. Should Officer Rallon have suffered irreversible damage because of your actions you will not want to leave the protection of the facility you are being taken to." Slowly the Vulcan turned and faced Bebram, "And you, you will wish the Klingons or the Romulons had you rather than my dealing with you should he be made to suffer long at all." Kirk briefly saw the coldness of determination on his friend's face that the young officer and clearly Bebram had seen and oddly felt sympathy for the dupe Bebram had attempt to kill Officer Rallon and Spock as well as for Bebram.

Bebram jumped up as Spock stepped away, "You all heard him. He just threatened me. Me. A superior. You all heard him."

Kirk just looked at the man and saw how pathetic he suddenly looked, "I did not hear a threat." He looked at the other five, "Did any of you?"

"No, Sir." Was said clearly by McCoy, Uhura, Chekov, and Sulu. Like the others Kirk just looked at his Chief Engineer as he freed his arms and walked up to where Bebram stood, looked first at Spock then at Bebram, "Nay, I heard no threat. I did hear a promise and, "he looked back at Spock, "tis one, Sir, I will be honoured to help ye fulfill to the fullest should the lad nay be as he should."

Slowly Spock and Mister Scott rejoined the five and they linked arms again and walked out as one.

When they all walked into Sick Bay M'Benga pointed to a monitor that had allowed the crew throughout the ship to watch what was to be the memorial service, "My sentiments exactly, Mister Spock. There clearly was nothing else keeping him going but instinct and wanting to get you home."

Briefly M'Benga looked at McCoy and then back at Spock, "I know you would want the truth so I will tell you that the ordeal has totally undone his treatment and has actually considerably worsened the original condition. He may never,"

"Doctor M'Benga! That is enough!" McCoy's anger was clear to them all. "I will inform both the Captain and Spock about Officer Rallon's,"

"I thank you for your honesty, Doctor M'Benga. I had feared his actions in saving me were worsening his condition. While I fully understand Doctor McCoy's outburst as he is most protective of his patients, a most admirable quality, you were correct in assuming I prefer to hear his present condition with no embellishments. Doctor McCoy most likely reacted the way he did as he also understands that, in situations like this. I am sure it was only your use of the word may that caused him to react as he did for he knows I do not wish to deal with what might or might not happen but to dedicate all attention to what is present."

"Fully understandable, Mister Spock. I, too, am used to and understand Doctor McCoy's protective outbursts."

McCoy looked at his patient's charts and the panel of diagnostic lights at the head of the bed and shook his head as he looked at M'Benga, "I'm sorry. Spock is right. I can be overly protective." He looked at Kirk and looked at the troubled hazel eyes, "I'll be damned if I know how, Jim, but he is still in there fighting. No perceivable change but I'll be damned if he is not in there fighting."

"He has mumbled from time to time as he has done before when he has been in Sickbay."

McCpy looked first at Kirn then at Spock, "Like you he reacts slightly differently to medications and often mumbles incoherently. Dreams, nightmares, recollections. Noting that means anything."

"There was one time when he seemed to be semi-aware, semi-lucid as he said were two words very clearly, possibly just nothing or perhaps a question. Just seemed off but as Doctor McCoy said, possibly meant nothing."

Spock looked intently at M'Benga**. **"Do you remember the words?" 


	12. Chapter 12

M"Benga looked first at Kirk and then at Spock. "Yes. They seemed so unusual. He said 'Spock about.' Just those two words. He must have,"

Spock tried not to smile but the others saw it, and even heard the soft laugh as she relaxed knowing they were all friends and he could reveal a bit of himself to them, "They are three words, Doctor. He was not asking for my location but remembering that we are to have a fight. He was saying 'Spock, a bout'." Spock slowly pulled his Vulcanness around him, "When he first started to assist me I was still stunned from the crash and the cold had an almost immediate impact on me. Up there as he was getting me secured and he said we could fight it out later, that we would have a bout in which I, and I quote, 'can try to knock some logic into me then.' but that he was going to get me home his way."

"Now that makes sense," M'Benga had nodded and walked away to give them some time alone.

For a moment Spock just looked at the still form then at Kirk, at McCoy, then back at Kirk, "He remembers, Jim. He remembers. He will fight now he has a goal. He will fight now as he remembers and has a goal and I look forward to that bout."

"Well, Spock, I have to tell you that that bout is a very long, long, long way away. He is a lot worse than when he went for treatment. Most of his damaged internal organs are barely functioning at all, all those muscles that he had gone for specialist treatment for are totally overstrained and most torn, some major ones almost shredded, from that horrendous pulling, those straps not only cut into him but with the stress of lunging against them then pulling, "

Spock closed his eyes as he remembered seeing how Rallon had strained at pulling the sled he was in up some inclines, how he would fall onto the snow in total exhaustion with his blood staining the snow red, how he had struggled and had repeatedly lunged into the harness he had made whenever the sled got stuck, how he had strained and struggled to pull the sled over or up crevasses, and how he never complained. It was obvious that Rallon had not stopped during the night. The Vulcan momentarily allowed the human desire to forget something to be a part of him as he remembered how at night Rallon would use a pole to test what was in front of him and had kept going. It had been at dusk that he had taken a sip of the soup and a mouthful of the coffee insisting that it was all he needed to keep him going. At dawn and dusk Rallon would hold the containers so he could have a few mouthfuls of each, always insisting that he take more as he was not moving and therefore not keeping warm. After they had had the nourishment Rallon would put the canisters back in with him, pull the harness back on, and start pulling again.

Spock felt the Doctor's hand on his shoulder, "Oh Spock, I'm sorry, I,"

"I understand, Doctor." McCoy heard it in the tone and saw it in the dark eyes that looked at him, the inner pain torment his friend was in, the pain and torment he would never speak of. "I was in no state to protest as he took the actions he took. I was being effected by the cold and whatever had been in the injection Commodore Bebram's officer had injected me with. When he immobilized my jaw I was able to swallow when he held the soup or the tea for me to drink but I could not talk."

As he walked to the bed Spock called on all his shielding to block the pain he knew he would feel as he gently touched the side of Rallon's face and whispered, "When you are well enough you can be assured that I will knock some logic into you. Sleep now. I will come back when you are awake. You are home on the Enterprise. Doctor McCoy is" he stopped for a moment, "we are all here with and for you."

Christine Chapel walked in and slowly looked at each one, "There is a proficient relief crew on the bridge, we have had our departure time set back four standard hours, and you are all to have a proper meal now, followed by some sleep. I have seen how none of you have eaten enough to keep you fit for duty."

"And what about yourself, Nurse Chapel? Have you been eating? Who has been watching you?"

"I have maintained my eating routine, Mister Spock. Doctor M'Benga can attest to the fact I have been here as well as those who have seen me in the Mess."

"That is good to hear. Would you and Doctor M'Benga care to join us?" None of the others had been surprised about Spock's invitation.

"We would be honored, Mister Spock. I will just get Doctor M'Benga,"

McCoy walked up to the bed Rallon was on and looked at the monitors then back at the sleeping figure, "Get Falter in as relief, Christine. He knows most about Rallon's history. And tell him if there is any change, and I do mean any change, to get me immediately."

"Very good. As soon as he arrives I shall join you."

Spock started to go then turned and again put his hand on Rallon's face, this time resting it for a bit longer as even through his shielding he could feel the deep pain in the man, "We, we must to go for a short time but we will be back. There are three competent medical personnel with you. You will not be alone."

The eight walked into the Mess and all present there cheered as they walked in. They started for the replicators but Nurse Chapel stood in front of them and pointed to a table to which an additional table and chairs had been added.

"It is on short notice but we have your meals already prepared and done the old fashioned way with fresh ingredients."


	13. Chapter 13

One by one the dishes came out, each a rare treat for the individual crew member. First was Chekov's pelmeni, then Sulu's donburri, Uhura had sweet potato and bean stew, Scotty had white pudding with neeps and tatters, McCoy got southern fried chicken and salad, Spock was some colorful vegetarian dish, and Kirk had a steak with baked potato. M'Benga joined them and Christine said, "Ours will be, here they are now." For Christine it was an old Earth meatloaf dish and for M'Benga a rice dish his mother used to cook for him. When they had been served their main meals they were served a variety of deserts reflective of their heritages.

Uhura smiled and said quietly, "In a way I am so very glad Glen is not here with us. He really likes the most disgusting looking meal. He called it aroyma. I have to admit I have tried it and it was good as long as you did not look at it. I do not think I could not have enjoyed this if it had been on the table."

Both Spock's eyebrows almost disappeared under his fringe. "Interesting, I have never heard of that meal."

"Nor had I, Spock. It was a mix of things and the word was an acronym for A Reheat of Yesterday's Meals, Again. His mother would have one day a week when she would reheat all the meals they had not finished that week and make one bit meal of them."

Spock looked at her and nodded, "If memory serves he grew up on outposts. His parents were agricultural scientists."

"That's right. Things were make do on them and you did not waste things. So," McCoy looked at Spock and half-smiled, "It would not be logical to waste food."

"Indeed, Doctor. I notice you have saved some of that pecan pie, no doubt to take back to your quarters to enjoy with some other liquid."

"You know me too well, Spock."

They had just finished their meal and were having a drink when an officer Kirk had often seen around in Engineer stood up and he heard Scotty mutter, "Oh no, he's always singing, and he's of Welsh heritage."

The officer walked and stood in front of Kirk, looked briefly at Spock then back at Kirk and opened his mouth

"When you walk through the storm  
Hold your head up high,  
And don't be afraid of - -"

The others in the room stood facing them and joined in the song, their voices raises at the end

"And you'll never walk alone."

The officer looked from Spock to Kirk and then back to Spock, "You'll never walk alone." He gave them and the others a quick nod, nodded to the assembled crew and left.

Kirk and Spock looked at each other almost simultaneously, the crew knew and understood their friendship and knew what it meant to them. They did not notice all the others but those at their tables leave as they looked at each other in quiet communication.

"The lad's never sung that before. But was right ta sing it." Mr Scott produced a bottle and poured each a small glass, pausing for a moment to look at Spock who nodded. After everybody had a glass he stood and said, "Ta the best ship and crew. Tis good to have it all back as it should be."

The others eventually left and just Kirk, Spock, and McCoy sat in the warmth and quiet of a friendship born and tested in time. Both McCoy and Kirk had a cup of coffee and Spock a cup of a fine Vulcan tea.

"I am appreciative of the fact you thought of the decontamination shower, Jim it would have helped warm his entire body at once."

"When Bones said he was still too cold I saw it and knew it would warm him." "I was not sure, Jim," McCoy glanced at Spock then looked at Kirk, "he was hypothermic and could have gone into shock, he could have,"

"Died on the mountain getting us down, Doctor. While I do agree that Jim's actions were perhaps unusual they were, as usual, effective." Spock seemed to study the tea left in his cup. "Had I been able to speak I would have ordered him to leave me. I calculated that he would freeze to death if he stayed with me given the weather and the rate he was proceeding at."

When he looked up he looked first at McCoy and then at Kirk and both his friends saw puzzlement on his face. "He had looked at me and said I could bring him up on charges once we were back on the ship if I wanted to. He told me he had fashioned a very crude short-range transponder and coded in my name and his initials on a frequency only the transporter operator would detect. I," he looked again at his two human friends and they saw a hint of guilt about his eyes, "I thought he was being affected by the cold. I, I did not believe him."

"I don't think anybody would have, Spock. Nobody knew," Kirk started, trying to find a way to stop his friend from feeling the guilt that was so obvious from how he just stared at his cup and how he was talking to it rather than looking at them.

"Mister Kyle did. He knew Rallon had such skills. Mister Kyle explained he had seen it before with Rallon, that it was crude but worked, and when I saw the device I realized to call it crude was high praise but it functioned. Mister Scott confirmed that he has a talent for making something useful out of what would normally be thrown out."

In a very low voice that made both Kirk and McCoy exchange looks he said, "He, he put it in the pocket of the jacket he put on me. He was making sure they would find me should he not survive. I, I will need to discuss that with him when he is able to have visitors."

"Spock, you have to know," McCoy started.

"I am aware, Doctor, that he will not be having visitors for some time. I am merely stating the fact that I have more than just the trip down the mountain to discuss with him."

"Spock, you have to know that there is every indication that he will have to return to Starbase Ten for,"

"No!" Spock half-stood, "He is not leaving this ship, Doctor." slowly he sat down.

His two friends looked at each other and Kirk knew in the way the blue and the dark eyes were fixed on each other that there was a conversation going on he was not a part of. He understood both sides, saw both sides, agreed with both sides. He was torn. He wanted the best treatment and care for his officer and yet felt he would only get the real care on the ship.

"I am the Chief Medical Officer of this ship, Spock." McCoy's voice was firm, **"**And I have,"


	14. Chapter 14

"I am fully aware of your rank and position on this ship, Doctor. I was," Spock's voice was calm yet authoritarian

"Will you let me finish?" McCoy briefly stood then looked back levelly at the Vulcan when he sat down. "Spock, I only said there is every indication I did not say it was a certainty. I have to see if I can work out a roster to help with all the assistance and rehabilitation work he will require on the ship. As it is I do not have enough staff in Sickbay and I have to be able to prove to the higher echelon that there will be sufficient staff to help with his care before he would be allowed to remain on the ship and undergo rehabilitation here."

"I will be available to assist whenever I am not needed on the bridge, Doctor. I do apologize for my rudeness in interrupting you and for the tenor of my voice at the time." Spock looked quickly at Kirk then back at McCoy, "I will be able to assist for eight standard hours at a time, Doctor. That allows for my required rest time as well as my periods of being on duty."

McCoy nodded and smiled, "I understand, Spock. Think if things were reversed I would have done more than interrupt. I had already thought you and most of the bridge crew would be involved in his rehabilitation." He looked at Kirk and Kirk nodded, "Know Jim will see you can be down there when he wakes up. I can really only make a full assessment when he is awake."

Spock's gaze stayed on the blue eyes that looked back at him, "And is clear of all your medications so he can give a clear statement as to how he feels. You will then, also, be able to assess his mental state"

"Both Spock and I will want be there when he wakes." Both McCoy and Spock looked at him. "I can think of no reason he should not remain with the Enterprise as his condition would enable McCoy to train the crew on how to deal with a," Kirk stopped himself. What was he, how would he best describe,

"Yes, Captain. Doctor McCoy could, if Officer Rallon is agreeable, use him in training the crew in how to deal with a fellow officer or other being with similar trauma should they encounter such in the future." Kirk nodded his thanks as Spock continued, "It will, of course, be up to Officer Rallon to agree or want off-ship rehabilitation. He will have to be told that the length of the off-ship rehabilitation will, no doubt, be of a shorter but more strenuous period of time."

McCoy nodded his head almost dejectedly, "That factor may be one of the two reasons that may make him want off-ship rehabilitation."

Both Kirk and Spock looked at McCoy and Kirk said, "And what would the other reason be?"

"Spock."


	15. Chapter 15

Kirk and Spock looked at each other then Kirk said, "Why Spock?"

For a moment steady blue eyes studied both Kirk and Spock before McCoy said, "There could be a possibility that he may come to associate Spock with the pain he will be in. Some of the pain he will be in can only be eased by total sedation. He may have a feeling of resentment towards Spock as he will have to almost relearn how to walk and even use his arms. And there is no telling how a man like him will feel about having to be helped with the most basic of feeding himself and his ablutions."

Only when he finished did McCoy reach out and put a hand on Spock's shoulders as he had seen how the Vulcan had closed his eyes and bowed his head as he had listened and McCoy knew the blasted Vulcan would be blaming himself for Rallon's injuries. "But I could be wrong about the man, Spock. I have been known to be wrong."

"I, I might possibly have thought that of others, Doctor." Dark eyes met and held the gaze of the doctor, "But not of him. I cannot see him like that. I was trying to understand him and his reasoning for doing what he did. Although I had not had many encounters with him apart from immediately after the times he had saved myself or Jim I cannot understand why he should have done what he did, most likely with full knowledge of what it was doing to his body." There was a moment's silence as Spock continued to look at McCoy, "And, Doctor, although you are seldom wrong about other humans I believe that Officer Rallon is not typical of many humans."

McCoy gave the shoulder under his hand a squeeze before he removed his hand, "Amen to that, Spock." he glanced at Kirk and nodded, "I have had that man on my biobeds so many times when others would have died. It used to amaze me who he would go after and what he would go into to recover a crewmember of this ship but now I accept it as part of him. You should too."

"I am trying to, Bones, but,"

There was no mistaking the urgency in Uhura's voice as, "Doctor McCoy to Sickbay. Doctor McCoy to Sickbay." came over the shipwide system.

By the time the three of them had rushed back to Sickbay they were surprised to see that Officer Rallon was in full restraints and McBenga stood shaking his head as he looked at the registers.

"What happened?" McCoy all but barked at McBenga.


	16. Chapter 16

"It was my fault," Nurse Chapel spoke up, self-loathing clear in her voice as well as her tone, "I only left his side for a moment and he must have had another moment of lucidity as he was struggling to get up and was saying, "I've lost Mister Spock. I have to go get him. Have to go get him." and I had to sedate him. All the registers were at maximum and he almost went into full arrest."

M'Benga stepped forward, "And I thought it best to put him in restraints. Despite what he has been through he is still very strong."

Spock had moved to the biobed and removed the restraints, "As I will be sitting with him these will no longer to necessary. Nurse Chapel," he lowered his voice and she turned to look at the Vulcan, "you are not to blame yourself for his actions. I should have remained with him till he is aware and accepts that we both are safe. With my absence he would have possibly thought he had left me. If anybody is to blame for that reaction of his it is largely Bebram as he is the one who orchestrated the crash."

Briefly Spock placed his hand on Rallon's face and looked down at the sleeping officer, "I am here and will remain here until you are fully aware of your surroundings and your reality. I apologize for being away from you for so long. Rest now, know you are not alone."

Through his touch the First Officer was aware of Rallon's fear he had left Spock on the mountain. The fear covered his pain, pain which seemed to be spasms, irregular spasms throughout his body. The sedation that M'Benga had given him was enough for now. Spock slowly removed his hand, pausing only a moment to brush the fringe into place.

McCoy walked up and looked at the registers, waved his scanner over the sleeping officer, looked at the readout, repeated the scan and shook his head before he looked first at Kirk then at Spock, "He is still in a horrendous amount of pain but the readings are improving. That bout is still a very long way away. I still have to ensure that he is willing to all me to use him to train the crew in caring for a being in a severe state of trauma. I still have to get Command to realize how important such skills are for all crewmembers of starships in order to keep him on the ship."

He looked from Spock to Kirk, "I will have to get the Captain's approval to implement such a scheme and his recommendations as well."

"I would support such a scheme, Doctor McCoy," M'Benga said as he walked out of the room.

"And I am sure the nurses could do with more experience with such cases," Nurse Chapel moved to stand by the office door. "I will prioritize which nurses would best benefit and which ones would be best to assist the others with this rare opportunity."

Kirk had kept watching his Vulcan friend, aware that he had only been partly listening, that that powerful mind would already have calculated so many ways of helping Rallon in his recovery. There was still considerable self-blame about his friend's eyes and Kirk knew it would take some time for Spock to accept what Rallon had done. It would be difficult for the logical man to accept it as Kirk was finding if difficult and he was human and illogical.

"If I may, Doctor, I would like to go to my quarters and change clothing before I sit with him. Would you please be with him till I return?"

"I'll be with him, Spock." Kirk stepped closer to the bed and took Rallon's hand in his own and looked into his friend's dark eyes. "I'll be with him till you get back."

For a moment there was silence as the two of them just looked at one another. Kirk saw the concern and guilt weighing heavy in his friend. Spock could see that Kirk felt a debt to Rallon as well as trying to figure out how to keep the man on his ship. All Spock did was nod his thanks then left.

As soon as the Vulcan had left McCoy looked at Kirk, "Want to tell me what that was all about? Care to share what just happened?"

_Gidday all - real life is gonna take a chunk of time over the coming week so may not be able to add more chapters for a week. Hope you are enjoying it so far._


	17. Chapter 17

There was a long silence as McCoy just stood waiting for his Captain and friend to answer him. He spent that time watching how Jim Kirk never looked away from Rallon's face, watching how Kirk possibly unconsciously was rubbing the back of the hand he was holding with his thumb. Then Mirkk nodded, "You saw what happened, Bones," Kirk looked at his friend, not too sure of just how to explain it to McCoy even though he knew that, of all people on the ship, it would be McCoy who would best understand. "You saw what happened." he repeated as though pleading with McCoy to say he understood.

"What I saw, Jim, was the way you two were looking at each other, they way you look at each other when you are having a silent conversation. This time that conversation no doubt just happened to be about my patient. My patient. Now what was it about?"

"If you must know it was, was about Rallon. It was about blame, fear about his future, and indebtedness." Kirk looked back at Rallon.

Before he responded McCoy reached out and placed a hand on his friend's shoulder, "Think we could both do with a coffee. I'll be right back." The only response he got was a nod.

As he went to the replicator to get the coffee McCoy knew he had known Jim Kirk long enough to know there was more, much more, yet he respected the man enough to accept what he had said. In the way his friend was looking at Rallon he knew that that blasted Vulcan would be the one feeling the blame but that somehow Kirk would feel a part of it through how close they were. The fear. Yes, he could imagine they were both concerned about the future Rallon faced. While he knew that should Rallon have to go off ship he would get good care McCoy also knew that he would get more personal care on the Enterprise where he was a person and not just a patient.

But, as he started to return with the cups he saw how Kirk reached out and stroked Rallon's forehead, it was the indebtedness that he knew his two friends did not have on their own. All those hours he had been watching Kirk while they waited for news after the crash he had felt the loss of a friend as well but knew he had to support Jim through it, knew that it was harder of Jim as there was that special, wonderful thing between the two so very different men that almost made them one. As deep as his own sorrow had been at the loss of that blasted Vulcan he knew it would be slowly killing a part of Kirk.

While others had seen the reunion McCoy knew they had only seen two friends reunited while he had seen so much more. He had seen a man who had lost the vibrancy he had had for life get it back, had seen a man become alive again. Others would have seen how Kirk had held Spock in the Transporter Room but he had seen more in that tight embrace than just one man supporting another. He saw the two becoming one again. Right now those two very different men thought they were the only ones who owed Rallon a debt that could not be repaid.

McCoy shook his head. There were many, many aboard the ship who felt that same indebtedness toward Rallon, not only for what he had just done but for so many other rescues he had done. So many rescues when the facts said there was no chance of finding the officers he set out to find. So many times McCoy had seen others sitting as Kirk was when Rallon had saved them.

Momentarily a light flickered on the display and McCoy saw how Kirk looked from Rallon to it and to him before back to Rallon. A severe spasm of pain had triggered it. there would be more of them. By all known medical facts…. No, by all known scientific facts alone this time Rallon should have died on that blasted mountain. He closed his eyes for a moment and could hear Scotty's words about not being able to change the laws of physics and nodded. Well now perhaps Rallon did not so much change them as challenge them.

Kirk nodded his thanks as he reached for the coffee and McCoy that the moment of eye contact so speak. "Jim, you two do not have an exclusive on them." McCoy said quietly but from how Kirk kept looking at him McCoy knew he had heard, really heard him. "I blame Bebram for causing this and I also blame myself for not being able to do more to help him. I am a doctor and I can do nothing for my patient. Of course I am afraid for what he may, and almost certainly will, have to go through for the rest of his life and for how this will affect his career in Starfleet, and there is no way, no way at all, that I can repay him for saving one of my closest and dearest friends."

As Kirk looked up at McCoy he saw something he had rarely seen on his friend's face, a deep uncertainty. In all the years he had known him, had been in Sickbay with him and a patient, he had, even when Spock was the patient, not seen that look. Carefully he reached out and touched his friend's arm, "Bones, tell me."

"I, I took an ancient oath upon becoming a doctor, Jim. It is an oath all professionally trained and qualified doctors take called the Hippocratic Oath and in it I swore I would do my best for the good of my patient and never do harm to anyone nor give a deadly medicine to any one if asked." Kirk saw the pain on his friend's face and heard it in his voice and gave the arm under his hand a gente squeeze to show he understood. McCoy nodded and lomentarily closed his eyes, took a deep breath, then looked back at Kirk, "I swore to do no harm, to give no deadly medicine. There was a moment earlier when I was alone with him, when I stood watching those registers showing what he was going through, what he would be going through for some time, and I, I knew I could give him something to end it. Nobody would know as I would do the autopsy. I got as far as going to the cabinet to get what I needed. I was that close Jim, I could have saved him all he is to go thorugh."

"But you stopped, Bones. You didn't do it."

"But I nearly did, Jim. I have never, never had that feeling before and hope I never have it again. In that split second I felt ashamed yet relieved. And you want to know why? I was reaching for the cabinet, Jim, and stopped. That's how close I was. I knew exactly how much of the two main drugs I needed and knew I could do it before anybody noticed. He would feel nothing and it would save him from what he is enduring and what he is yet to endure. You want to know the one thing that stopped me?" Kirk just nodded not just because he wanted to know but because he knew McCoy needed to talk, needed to free himself from the guilt he so clearly felt.

"Bones," Kirk had been shocked by what McCoy had just said.

"I was so, so close to doing it. I thought it was the least I could for him for all he had done. I did not even think of that oath, of anything but stopping the pain he was in and would, will be. I was reaching for the cabinet and stopped. Rather I was stopped."

"I would be intersted to know what stopped you, Doctor from doing that one action." Spock walked in and up to McCoy and looked at him with such understanding McCoy wanted to hug the man.

"He stopped me, Spock. I was reaching for the drugs, the poisons that would have ended his pain and he stopped me." The knowledge that the Vulcan was not judging him gave McCoy the strength to look at him as he spoke. "He stopped me."

"May I ask how he was able to do that, to control your actions, while as heaviliy sedated as he was?" relief almost knocked him over as McCoy looked into the dark eyes. There was that calm acceptance and reassurance he often found when he looked at his Vulcan friend. He felt no shame or fear of rejection from either of his friends now for what he almost had done.

"Spock, not now." Kirk had almost stood. He knew Dpock did not understand a lot of the emotions of Humans but surely he could see how hurt and shamed McCoy was by what he was saying.

"No. No, I need this, Jim. You two have a right to know this. I need this out in the open so it won't haunt me." McCoy looked at his two friends, these two very different men, and then at Rallon. How could they understand how such a disabled, drugged, and disorintated patient was so easily able to stop him? What would they think of him for being so weak when they knew how he did it?


	18. Chapter 18

"Please continue, Doctor." Spock still stood before him, watching him. McCoy was sure that that blasted Vulcan could read so much meaning into every movement let alone word.

"As I said I had been watching him in agony and decided what had to be done, knew I had to be the one to do it. I had it all planned out. Knew how to ensure nobody else would ever know. I got as far as actually reaching for the opening to the cabinet where we keep the restricted medication when he did it." McCoy looked back at Rallon then at Kirk and finally back at Spock, "He, he moaned. It was a gutteral moan of a man still fighting, of a man determined that no matter how great the pain he was not going to let it take him. I turned and saw all the registers were high and yet he was fighting. I know you will find this highly illogical, Spock, but for that split second I saw him fighting to get you down that blasted mountain. I saw him as he had fought through so many other lesser times he has been a guest in my area. I saw that and knew I had no right to not let him fight his fight. I realized I could help him fight, that for more than one reason I had to help him fight. I also realized how close I had come to breaking that oath and that he had pulled me back, had saved me from myself."

Instead of seeing the amused or accusing looks he had expected to see in the dark eyes that had never left studying his face, McCoy saw only acceptance and understanding before Spock said, "You have nothing to feel guilty or self-doubt about, Doctor. You did what not just a doctor would do but what a fellow sentient being would, especially one as caring and compassionate as youself. I would expect nothing less from you."

"My feelings exactly, Bones." Kirk stood up and placed a hand on his shoulder and waited till they looked at each other, "You just had a moment when you let that terrible thing we humans have, your emotions, override your logic."

Kirk looked at his First Officer and smiled, "What do you say about that, Spock? About McCoy's emotions dominating his logcal action."

"Captain, I have always found with Doctor McCoy that logic is often sadly lacking and, suprisingly, it does not seem to happer his ability." Very slowly Spock walked over to the bed and touched Rallon's forehead then looked back at McCoy and Kirk, "I will sit with him now and you two shoud get some rest."

"You will contact me when he is awake?" McCoy looked at Spock hoping that the Vulcan could hear what was not said.

"I will contact you as soon as he is awake," Spock looked directly at McCoy, "and aware, Doctor."

For a moment Kirk was aware that neither of them was really conscious of him being there, that they were having their own conversation and finally McCoy nodded, "Thank you, Spock, I;ll be in my quarters."

As they walked from Sickbay Kirk looked at his Chief Medical Officer and friend and said, "Okay. Bones, it is your time to tell me what all that was about?"

"Not here and not now, Captain" Kirk almost stopped as he had been surprised by the tone in McCoy's voice that eased as he added, "In my quarters over a long drink."


	19. Chapter 19

Once he was certain that Doctor McCoy and the Captain were well away Spock allowed himself to really look at Rallon. This was the first time he had been able to study the form, the first time he had been able to supress all human emotion deep within himself and just look at the form before him and see the extensive damage to it. When Jim and McCoy had been present he had not been able to thoroughly study what toll the trip down the mountain had taken. Now he could look at Rallon and let himself not see his fellow officer, not think of what he had seen or previously known about the injuries. This time he was able to study the wounds, at the damage, from a totally scientific viewpoint.

It had taken him twenty-eight point four standard minutes to finish examining the form and to acknowledge that is was extensively damaged. He had taken the last seven of those minutes to read through what Doctor McCoy had noted and found he did agree with the doctor's findings. When he had returned to the bed he looked at Rallon as a fellow officer. An officer who should be dead. An officer who should not have been able, when all that medical and physical factors were taken into consideration, to do what he had done.

Cautiously he reached out and lightly touched the side of Rallon's head, fingers knowing just where to connect. Pain much greater than he had experienced from a human jolted through him. McCoy had been correct. He was in agony.

"I am not sure if you can hear me," for a moment the Vulcan hesitated while he decided how to address the man, while he acknowledged the man's need for the human factor, "Carl. I am aware of the great pain you are in and I am about to use a technique used for generations in many civilizations on many planets. It is a combination of the likes of acupressure, Bowen methods, and some Vulcan methods both prereform and since reform. I will apply some pressure with use of one of my fingers to different points of your body. I will also slightly move your limbs to their limits but no further. This method has proven beneficial for the relief of pain. Later you and I have much to discuss and I am certain that should this cause you any more pain you will let me know. I apologize now for what pain I may cause, I only intend to ease the pain."

Slowly, systematically, Spock worked on pressing the points he had seen the healers use and ones he had studied. There was a slight lowering in the pain indicator when he had finished and that satisfied him. It was known that the results of the process took time and was best aided with the patient drinking plenty of fluids. He would ensure he told McCoy that somehow the doctor was to increase his fluid intake. For now he was content with what he had done as he had lessened some of his pains.

From what he had seen of the body McCoy would be able to train not only the crew but also give his own officers more instruction how to help rehabilitate a severely physically injured officer. He had seen how Rallon had been when he was placed on the shuttle. He had seen what Rallon had done to get him down. He had seen the extensive damage that McCoy had not told him of.

"What to tell me what you two were saying back there?" Kirk had taken the drink McCoy handed him, took a sip, but keep looking at his friend.

"I was just letting him know that I would know if he tried playing doctor." McCoy did not look directly at Kirk as he knew his friend would know it as not the whole truth.

"What to try that again, Bones?"

"He was reassuring me he would do none of that mind melding and would let Rallon wake up on his own." This time he did look into his friend's eyes. "He's hurting just as much as Rallon, blaming himself for what Rallon did although he knows there is no way he could have stopped Rallon from doing what he did."

"And if I asked Spock for his version?" Kirk knew McCoy was right but wondered what his Vulcan friend was telling him..


	20. Chapter 20

"He would most likely tell you that is was a personal matter but basically was him telling me he would just sit with him till he wakes naturally at which time he will summon me." McCoy poured them both a second drink, "I don't know about you but before Rallon wakes I want to get a bit of sleep. I suggest you do the same."

With Rallon in clearly a deep sleep Spock let his mind go back and recall the whole incident from just before the crash. He should have noticed how Bebram's officer was, for a human, not only unusually quiet but also intensely studying not the radar but the topography out the window. Even as the man was crashing the craft he was still watching the topography. The craft hit hard and it came back to him, something he had forgotten till then, the way the man had smiled and said quietly, "Perfect." The following events that he could remember were as he had told Jim and the others.

Looking at Rallon he knew the one thing he had not told them was of the occasional human emotions that would surface as they were slowly getting off the mountain. It had been most unfortunate that on a few of those occasions Rallon had been looking at him and had seen them. All Rallon had said was, "I will get you home alive. You just keep thinking of all of those waiting for you at home."

Home. Spock nodded. That was what the Enterprise was. It had been his home for almost as many years as he had lived at the home of his parents. Over the years the command crew had been his immediate family and the crew his extended family. As he looked at Rallon he realized that some of the crew clearly thought the same.

There was a slight change to Rallon's breathing and Spock moved to stand closer to the head of the bed as Rallon moaned and moved his head slightly. A few times before Rallon had slightly moved his head and moaned but this was a different sound, a sound he knew from the times McCoy or Kirk had woken from a long sleep. Spock noted the slight movement of the arms and then saw the eyes open for a moment, the look of surveillance so quickly about the man's face and a smile when he looked up at the Vulcan.

"Gotcha home."

Just for an instant Spock was going to ask how he knew where he was but had seen how he had looked around and knew that Rallon had been in Sickbay many times after some of his rescue missions. He remembered having visited him more than a few times when he had come out for him and the Captain either together or individually.

"Yes. Thank you."

The smile broadened, "Thought, thought Vulcans did not thank logic. It would have been illogical for me to come down alone. Captain Kirk would have furious if I had done that." there was a great weariness in his voice and Spock was aware of the man really looking at him, "You, you pass Doctor McCoy's okay?"

"Yes. You still need to rest. I have some questions which will wait till you have rested a bit longer."

"Am tired. Tell Doctor McCoy no more meds. So tired."

As Rallon slipped back into a deep sleep Spock let the relief he felt escape in a long sigh. He was relieved not only that Rallon had awoken from such a deep medicated sleep but also that he was fully aware of where he was and that Rallon recognized him. Clearly Rallon remembered how thorough McCoy was when a crewmember had spent any time as a patient. While he would have denied it to anybody else Spock would admit it to himself that he had been surprised and pleased that Rallon had been concerned about his wellbeing. If questioned he would have said that it was only logical that a person with such an exemplary reputation for rescue work would be concerned about those who they had saved.

He would have to tell McCoy what he had done to Rallon, tell of how he had learned to do the treatments and did not want Jim to know as it was medical and of a deeply personal nature. He would have to tell McCoy what he was unable to block while in contact with Rallon.

Aware that both Kirk and McCoy would get some much needed rest before they came back to Sickbay Spock let himself drift into a light trance so that should Rallon awaken again he would be able to assist him.

McCoy woke and walked to Sickbay, pausing at the door long enough to see the Vulcan sitting next to the bed, his hand resting beside Rallon's. When he looked at the registers he knew something had happened as they were down, not as far as he would like them to be but they were moving down. Knowing how Spock would not want him to see his hand there, an almost human thing to do, McCoy coughed and saw Spock move his hand as he turned. There was a flicher of relief that Kirk was not with him.

"I trust you slept well, Doctor."

"Yes. You get any?"

"I am fully rested. Rallon did have a brief moment of awareness when he woke briefly."

"And?" all the years they had spent together let McCoy know that there was more but, as usual, he was going to have to pry it out of the Vulcan.


	21. Chapter 21

"It was just a brief moment, Doctor. He was lucid enough to know we are back on the Enterprise and that he is in Sickbay." The Vulcan met the doctor's gaze and knew he would want to know more but the rest was personal. He saw acceptance in the blue eyes.

"So he will be able to give us his version of the trip down the mountain? I don't suppose he said anything about that to you."

"No. It was clear he knew we were back on the Enterprise but that was about all. He did admit to being very tired."

"Mind telling me what you did to lower the pain levels?"

"I just applied some acupressure, Bowen methods, and some Vulcan methods that I believed might lessen some of his pain. It was pleasing to see that they did."

McCoy shook his head, trust the Vulcan to surprise him. "Mind telling me how the Vulcan methods are different."

The faintest of smiles flashed across Spock's mouth as he nodded, "McCoy, it was nothing to do with telepathy as such, just an ancient touch therapy. Quiet common, actually. Not all that different from what you would call deep tissue massage."

"So you picked up nothing while you are in contact?"

"If he had been conscious and had given me permission I would have been able to assist him more with the management of the pain. As it is I was only able to slightly ease it for him." McCoy heard the regret and some guilt in the barritone voice, "When he has further recovered I will perhaps be able to assist him more."

"You do realize that he may need medical attention beyond what is available on the Enterprise?" McCoy was unsure how to raise the topic he would have to with Spock.

"I am fully aware of that, Doctor. I am also aware that should he not be able to recover to the dictates of Starfleet he will have to leave the ship, possibly for the rest of his carreer."

There was something in the way Spockk had lowered his voice when saying Rallon might have to leave the ship for the rest of his career that made McCoy really study the tall man before him. He usually only heard that deep blame when Spock was referring to Jim or even to a few of the bridge crew but not when it had happened to other crew members. Having known the Vulcan for so long McCoy knew what to look for and saw it, the guilt. He knew Vulcans claimed not to have emotins but as he just looked at his friend McCoy saw the two sides at war. Clearly Spock felt that Rallon's injuries were his fault, that he was the prime cause of the man's extensive injuries.

Gently he put a hand on the slender shoulder closest to him and gave it a squeeze so the Vulcan looked at him, "Now you listen to me, Spock. We have a few days before we need to even think about that. What we have to do is get him to the stage where I can fully assess the extent of his injuries and calculate what sort of he will need, how long it will take, and if that can be done aboard the ship. First things first, Spock. Get him to where he can be properly assessed first. I have spent more than enough time with Rallon to know his rate of recouperation and I think we both know how he will try to push himself."

When the dark eyes kept looking at him but the Vulcan remained silent McCoy continuted, "You have to know that what you did and you being here has really helped him start to come back. For him to admit to you that he was tired is good news. He is acknowledging that he has his limits. There have been times he has been brought in here and refused to accept his body has limits till he was shown proof that he had saved whoever he went out to get."

"He was on Starbas Ten because of saving Jim and myself, Doctor. I was part of is first injuries and I only compounded them further on that mountain."

"And just how did you do all that, Spock? How did you do that all by yourself?"

"Doctor, I was the senior officer and,"

"That would have meant nothing to Rallon. Every instinct in that man has, through his family bloodlines, his very natural genetic structure, been atuned to helping others. You had no way of stopping him doing what he did. Like I said, I have spent a lot of time with this man and the only way," gently McCoy placed both hands on Spock's shoulders and looked directly into the dark troubled eyes, "Spock, the only way you could have stopped him from doing for you what he did would been to have killed him."

In the blue eyes looking at him and deep within himself the Vulcan knew it was the truth. He had seen how Rallon had been on the mountain. He had realized that Rallon would not stop till they got down the mountain. Through the hands on his shoulders he felt McCoy wanting to help him see the truth. Slowly he nodded and McCoy nodded back and released him.

"He did ask me to tell you he wanted no more medications."

"His exact words?"

"No. His exact words were, 'Tell Doctor McCoy no more meds.' which I took to mean he did not wish to have any more of your medications. Obviously they upset his systems as they do mine."

"Difference being that with him they make him more placid not more argumentative."

"They do not," Spock stopped as he saw the twinkle about McCoy's eyes and realized he had reacted just as the doctor had wanted. He glanced back at where Rallon lay. "There is a Vulcan herbal tea that will help with his pain as well as mildly sedating him that I would like to prepare for him."

"That one you have sometimes given Jim and even to me on occasion?"

"Yes."

McCoy remembered only too well the few times he had had the tea and how it had eased his muscular pain and given him a good sleep. "That would be acceptable, Spock."

"I will make enough for you as well as you, Doctor McCoy, have been avoiding having sufficient sleep."

"Blasted Vulcan, I just had a sleep. Who is the doctor here? I told you I had a sleep."

"One in how many days, Doctor? You are the doctor but I can tell from looking at you now that you are in need of a deep refreshing sleep. I believe that what you term as a sleep is what others, including the Captain, would term a long nap. Is my assessment in error?" The dark eyes were watching him and McCoy could tell the Vulcan knew the tell-tale signs he could not hide.


	22. Chapter 22

Jim Kirk woke up and realized that the sleep he had just had was the most restful he had had for some time. As he thought of the events before he went to bed he realized that McCoy must have put something in his drink as the last thing he remembered was having a drink with Bones. That would have been why he slept so well and so long. Bones had wanted to do that to him since Spock went missing and he had been on guard and not taken anything from him. Kirk laughed at himself at the thought of how Bones would have been waiting and when he had relaxed Bones had made sure he slept.

Spock was home and safe. For the first time in days he felt relaxed, he felt himself. He was already in command mode and mentally reviewing what he had to do.

There was that suggestion he was to put forward about Rallon staying on the ship so McCoy could use him to train the medical teams how to deal with patients so severely traumatized. He would have to make sure that neither Spock not McCoy had any influence on Rallon's decision. While McCoy would be keen to do it Spock would be hesitant as Kirk had seen that guilt and blame cross his friend's face when he looked at Rallon. Both were right both had their own reasons and he knew it would be up to him to have the final say. He would have to listen to and weigh up the three other points of view and then decide.

Set with what he had to do Kirk first went to the Bridge and walked around checking how Uhura, Sulu, and Chekov was doing, and was not surprised to see Scotty in the center seat. As he walked around he was aware of them all watching him and he paused by the turbolift doors and looked back at them, "I'll be down in Sickbay."

Both McCoy and Spock were there when he walked in which had not surprised him and he could tell from one look that they had been, also not surprisingly, discussing something and Spock had just needled McCoy about it. It had obviously surprised them both when he walked in as they both looked like guilty children

"Mind telling me what is going on?"

"Nothing of major significance, Captain. Doctor McCoy and I were just discussing his need for sleep. He has been having what can only be referred to as naps."

It had been the way the Vulcan had said nothing to Jim about Rallon's moment of awareness that made McCoy swallow his resistance and say, "And I have agreed to drink a cup of that Vulcan tea he has made for us before and have a good sleep once I know Rallon is, as it appears, on the start of the road to a good recovery."

"That's good news. Anything special get that recovery started?"

"Spock used some Vulcan voo-doo on him."

"It was not voo-doo but was a combination of natural healing methods of Vulcan and other cultures. They were methods I have, on occasssion, used on both of you to ease muscular pain."

"Has he been conscious?"

The glance that passed between his two officers gave him the answer before Spock said, "He was conscious for a brief moment. He knows we are home and I am safe. He also asked not to have any more of McCoy's medications."

"Bones?"

"Well, at this stage it is largely up to him. Whatever Spock did has eased his pain and he will be making not just me but him as well some of the Vulcan tea to get him off the sedatives."

"What is troubling you, Jim?"

"How long before I can talk with him? I need to ask him for his permission to work with you on that training idea, Bones. I need to make sure he understands what it means and then I can put it foreward. As it is at the moment he will officially have to be taken off the ship as he does not meet the physical fitness standards."

Another glance between McCoy and Spock made Kirk wonder what his two senior officers and friends had planned. "Spock reminded me of how it has only been a two months since Rallon's last physical and he is not officially due for another physical for ten months as his injuries were not caused on the ship and were not originally treated on the ship."

Kirk's confusion clearly showed as Spock looked at him, "It is clearly stated in the regulations, Captain, that for injuries first treated off the ship the attending physician or medically trained person who first attended the patient must submit a full report before any action can to taken to remove or reinstate an officer from or onto a ship. Rallon has medical training, granted minimal but still medical training, and he did attend his own injuries as well as my ones. It is he, therefore, who would have to submit a full report before he could be removed from the ship."

"And I can verify his medical training for his role has been kept up to date and that the work he did on Spock was top-notch." McCoy rocked on his heels, "When he is in a communicative state we can talk about his assisting me in training others on how to best treat a traumatized patient."

"Neither the Doctor not I have made any plans about him staying aboard untill we know what he wants and if he is willing to stay on the ship to be helpful in training others in the care and treatment of a severely traumatized patient until he is fully recovered at which time he should be fit enough to be put back in the roster."

Despite their bickering Kirk knew there was something special between his friends. This was just another example of how they could work together to get what they wanted, and they wanted Rallon on the ship.

"So you two have this all worked out?" he saw them both nod. "Well, what if he decides he wants off the ship?"

Apologies for earlier gafffff - real life has caused a few problems - this should have been what was posted.


	23. Chapter 23

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Kirk could tell from their reactions that while Spock had thought it a possibility McCoy had not. There was a slightly stunned look about his eyes and he slowly shook his head, "I have worked on that man so many times I cannot see him wanting off this ship. I can think of no reason why he would want off this ship."

"What about you, Spock? If we try to make him stay you must know he could come to resent saving you. He could come to resent what you represent, all the pain he will go through." Kirk saw his Vulcan friend just briefly look away and thin his lips. "There is that possibility. You have, we have all seen it in others."

Two dark eyes locked onto his, "I have studied the man, Jim. I was aware of his actions on the mountain and on occasion felt what he was feeling and there was only two things on his mind. One was getting me off the mountain and the other was getting home to the ship. To him, as to many of us, this ship is his home. It is only logical that he would want to stay. Also, in the brief moment that he was aware he mentioned home, meaning the Enterprise."

Kirk did not look away from the dark eyes, "He called the Enterprise home?"

"He stated he got me home. He did not say to my home or his home, just home so he clearly thinks of the Enterprise as home." As Spock kept looking at his friend and captain he could see that Jim knew what he meant, that to Jim the Enterprise was home as well.

"Did he say what he wanted?"

"Only that did not want any more of Doctor McCoy's medications which I can fully understand. He also mentioned he was tired."

Kirk nodded, "So we wait till he tells us what he really wants. We have to be ready in case he does want off the ship."

"Just as we have to be ready to start training and treatment should he state he does want to remain on the ship."

"I would like to be part of the training," Spock started.

"We both will be part of the training, Spock. I should know how to treat any crew member who gets in the state he is in should I be the only one with them."

"Jim, the odds of that,"

"And what were the odds of it happening this time?"

"Without knowing the," Spock stopped as he looked at Kirk, seeing that it was a rhetorical question, seeing the he knew there were too many variables to give any remotely correct answer, and nodded, "Point made, Captain."

"Right, now you and Bones to get some sleep and I will sit with him as I have had the most fitful sleep."

McCoy started, "Jim, I should be,"

"In bed getting some sleep. Spock needs if not sleep at least a break, a rest." When neither moved his expression changed as he looked from one to the other, "Do I have to make that an order?"

After they had gone Kirk went and stood by the biobed and looked down at Rallon. How many officers were on his ship that were like Rallon, officers he knew so little about? Officers who were names on rosters? Officers who thought of the Enterprise as their home and not just another ship they were to serve on?

Memories of coming into Sickbay and seeing Rallon laying on a biobed four times before came back to him. Four times he had come down to thank Rallon for saving the landing party he was on. Four times he had come down and never visited him again. This time it was so very different. This time he had exposed the lengths a highly regarded officer would go to for promotion. This time he had not been on the ship. As he looked at Rallon Kirk knew he had to say the main reason he was there, _This time it was Spock he had saved. How do I thank the person who saved the better half of me?_

Without thinking, almost instinctively, Kirk reached out and brushed Rallon's fringe to the side he knew Rallon usually had it brushed to. Two light brown eyes opened and looked up at him and Kirk saw him try to move.

"Easy." He put a restraining hand lightly on Rallon's shoulder. "You need to take it easy."

"Captain. I, I should have reported in."

"You did, to Mister Spock."

"He, he really okay?"

"Yes. I sent him to his quarters to rest."

"He was here?"

"Yes." for a moment Kirk felt fear sweep through him as he was certain Rallon had forgotten talking to Spock.

"Thought, thought it was dream. He tell Doctor no more med?"

Kirk let out a held breath and nodded, "He told McCoy you did not want any more medications and McCoy has not given you any more."

"You have to file my transfer papers."

"We can talk about that later. You need to rest. We will talk about it later with Spock and Doctor McCoy. You just rest. I will be right here."

As Rallon drifted off to sleep Kirk shook his head. He had not thanked him for saving Spock. He had tapdanced around it, had not known quite how to say it yet knew it would have to be said. The others had all believed Spock had died but he had not believed it. He had not felt it and, he realized now, a part of him had subconsciously thought that of anybody else for Spock to be lost with he would be safe with Rallon.

There had been that tiny part of his mind that had kept repeating what his Chief Engineer had once said about Rallon when he had saved them from a very bad situation, "You call me the miracle worker but when it comes to rescues that is Rallon's title. He's a terrier when it comes to that. Gets a hold and won't let go."

Won't let go. That was it. Rallon had not let go. Kirk looked down at him and wondered if he would have regrets now of not letting go. As Spock said, he could have, should have, left him.

Quietly, and mostly to himself as he reached out and adjusted the blanket over Rallon, Kirk said, "I am not going to let you go either. You called this home and home is where you belong."

Despite himself Kirk had dozed off and was sleeping with his head resting on the bed when Spock and McCoy walked in together. For a moment they just stood looking at him. The McCoy moved first and placed a hand on his captain and friend's shoulder.

**A/N Isn't the real world a bit much at times? Expecting you to do things like work, tidy the house, get the gardens ready for winter, pay bills, cook. . . . Thanks for hanging in there – think there are about three more chapters. Comments/reviews most welcome.**


	24. Chapter 24

McCoy stepped up to the bed and put his hand briefly on Rallon's forehead as the eyes fluttered. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired. Sore. Thanks for no meds."

"I need to ask you some questions that are fairly important. You feel up to having to seriously think and answer them?"

"Don't ask for calisthenics."

"It is highly illogical to expect Doctor McCoy to ask you to do any form of exercising."

Rallon looked over at Spock and smiled, "Enough on mountain for days."

"Something like that. What he wants to ask relates to what happened to you on that mountain."

They all saw the puzzled look on Rallon's face, "What me on mountain?"

"Blasted Vulcan. That was not how I wanted to approach this."

"This? What?"

Kirk walked to where Rallon could see all three of them easily, "We have a problem and you can help us with it.

"What problem?"

"By Starfleet regulations we are meant to hand patients with your extensive injuries who require long-term physiotherapy over to medical facilities on a Starbase which means signing you off the ship."

For a moment Rallon closed his eyes and bit his bottom lip then opened his eyes and looked first at Spock. Momentarily Spock had prepared himself to see some form of human anger in his eyes but when the light brown eyes looked at him there was only understanding and acceptance. "It was my choice, Sir. I see no problem. Regulation."

"Doctor McCoy has a way you could stay on the ship if you so desire."

"How? The Captain said regulations."

McCoy moved to stand beside Rallon and looked right at the man for a moment in silence as he sorted out just what to say, "Now rather than have Spock bore you to death with all the details and exactness I will put it this way. It is also in the regulations that should there be an opportunity for a wounded officer to be of service on a ship in any special capacity they are able to remain aboard the ship should they want to rather than be sent to a special facility."

"Okay. I want to stay but,"

"You would be helping me show your fellow crew members how to treat officers with the sort of extensive injuries you have. There will be some pain to you as they will have to practice on you. It will take," McCoy looked from Kirk to Spock, and then back to Rallon, "a very long time before you are officially fit enough to pass the standard fitness requirements."

"I be on Enterprise?"

"Yes." Kirk looked at the officer then at McCoy and Spock and saw that they had also noticed the incomplete and short sentences and realized he was still very tired. He also saw they were also, like him, anxious to hear his decision.

"No problem. I'll stay. I'll help. Tired." Rallon closed his eyes.

Spock reached out and adjusted the blanket on Rallon. "You rest. We will come back when we have filed our reports and let Starfleet Command know you are staying aboard the Enterprise to assist Doctor McCoy train the crew. I will return after my shift to discuss further what you can expect."

"Lemon donut?"

"I will bring you one when I return."

"Thanks."

The three senior officers walked out together in a formation established years before. Each was wondering if the others were aware that the one thing that none of them had done was thank Rallon for what he had done. McCoy felt good that he would be able to watch Rallon's recovery as well as train more crew on immediate field medicine. Despite so often proclaiming he had no emotions Spock was acutely aware of a feeling of satisfaction that he would be able to watch Rallon regain what he had lost getting him down that mountain. To Kirk everything felt right now.

**FIN **

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**Thanks for reading this. Hope you enjoyed it. As was asked by friend I am retyping some of the stories written for friend in 1980's for her mother who was major Trekker and a terminal patient - kept hard copies of the ones I typed on electric typewriter (before I had a computer). All were done over one weekend as was working 70 hours a week. **

**Thanks again for your time and input.**


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